How to prepare for marriage in a godly way
I have a confession to make… I really hate the term “wife material”!
To me, the term implies that only a select few women have what it takes to be a bride. And I don’t agree with that.
I believe that every woman on this earth naturally has what it takes to be a wife and mother, but it’s up to you to hone your instincts and turn them into practical skills.
The truth is, if you ever want to get married, you have to prepare for marriage by being single. There are certain habits that you need to adopt before you say I am doing it so that you can seamlessly transition into married life.
That’s why I decided it was time to share with you some practical steps on how to prepare for marriage or how to become a “bride” if you will.
How to prepare for marriage while being single
- Become financially responsible
I will be honest with you my sister. If you want to get married, you need money. Not a lot of money, but a fair amount.
Because when you start your sacred wedding season a lot will change and you will start to create new life for yourself and your husband.
You could both decide to buy a house, a new car, or even have a baby. These are all big expenses, especially a child, that you will share with your partner.
In order to prepare for these financial burdens, you need to become financially responsible. Learn how to manage your money while you are single so that you are well prepared as a wife.
This includes creating a plan on how to pay off any debt , like student loans or credit card debt. It also means that you have to learn how to save a portion of your monthly income and ideally create a 6 month emergency fund.
Developing healthy spending habits as a single woman with a single income will allow you to better manage your new combined income once married.
- Become a housewife / janitor
Now I know many of you women will look at this point aside, but I want you to keep an open mind as you read on.
First, I want to assure you that I don’t believe that women should stay at home and take care of children. However, I believe that women are most of the time the main household helpers and babysitters.
Because these tasks usually come more naturally to us than to men and contribute to the male / female polarity that attracts men and women to each other.
Now remember, I was dating a chef years ago, and back then I never touched a pot or a pen. It was his passion, so he happily took over.
But I was nonetheless very excited to contribute to a beautiful candlelit dinner by decorating the room, planning the desserts and tidying up afterwards.
In a regular relationship dynamic, having an eye for the household and a helping hand for care subconsciously adds to the attraction of men to women.
Therefore, even if you don’t know how to cook, you probably know how to make a nice dinner to take out. Go girl!
Therefore, to prepare for marriage, learn first and foremost how to take care of yourself .
This includes cooking, cleaning, and laundry for yourself! Because being an adult is having the life skills to maintain a household.
- Become a good partner
I recently started reading The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm and one thing he said in the introduction stuck with me. People don’t invest in learning to love but only in things that can make them money.
And I agree.
Despite the fact that most of us haven’t learned how to date or love, we all assume that when the right one shows up, we will suddenly be able to love it the right way.
Well, news flash. 50% of marriages end in divorce. And all thought they knew how to love their other half.
This is why the most important step you can take in preparing for marriage is to become a good partner.
Study the art of loving by researching what it takes to be considered a good lover and friend to someone.
I mean how many of you have had friends in the past who were afraid to be friends. Don’t make this mistake as a girlfriend.
If you know that you tend to be needy in relationships , look for ways to overcome your attachment. If you suffer from low self – esteem , be sure to develop coping mechanisms that will prevent you from projecting your insecurities onto your partner.
And if you’ve subconsciously sabotaged a relationship in the past, then find out what’s stopping you from attracting healthy love.
You don’t need to be in a relationship to work on these behaviors, but you can start right now as a single woman.
Learn how to be the best you can be, by doing the job alone or by joining a program such as my signature dating and relationship course “Become The One” , where I help women identify what is stopping them from doing it. attract a great man and love.
- Being able to find a job and earn money
This point applies to every woman, even one who wants to be a housewife and a mother when married.
Acquire a qualification, skill or education that earns you money.
Yes ma’am, even if you hope to marry a (rich) man who will take care of you and the children, do not underestimate the importance of being independent.
Nowadays everyone should have an education that allows you to work if needed. Because God only knows what can happen later in your life, it will force you to find a job.
People divorce (also in church), die or get sick, and you may need to contribute to household income.
Therefore, an important step in preparing for marriage is having a career or an education that no one can take away from you.
Of course, you can already work there as a single woman while waiting for your future husband .
But even if you don’t, create a plan that will get you there.
- Identify and pursue your goal
What are your goals in your life? What do you want to have accomplished at the end of your life or do you want to be remembered?
Imagine standing before God and asking, “What have you done with the time I have given you on earth!”
If you don’t have an answer to this question yet, then now is a good time to start thinking about it and take intentional steps to make it happen.
As a single woman, you need to create a meaningful life for yourself!
And I emphasize this because I want to remind you that your goal doesn’t start only when you’re married.
Build a career or pursue a calling that utilizes your God-given purpose.
And if you are now worried that your job in the bank may not be your goal, then I have good news for you. It doesn’t have to be.
Your goal can be something that doesn’t return monetary value but is nonprofit or voluntary.
Your goal can also simply be a passion for yourself that you work on after school or work. This is what happened to me and how this blog was born .
Of my passion for sharing the word of God, while providing practical and achievable steps to others.
So, preparing for marriage God’s way really means connecting with him and understanding what you are called to in each season of your life and using it to become the best in yourself.