Being sympathetic in the eyes of others is not a natural trait, it can be learned!
Many people think that being nice is only for a particular group of people.
As if these individuals had been endowed with this quality by nature. And, generally speaking, these people are beautiful, talented and extremely sociable.
And, I understand this is confusing. But, this idea is completely wrong.
In fact, being nice in the eyes of others is up to you. You can control your level of sympathy with your emotional intelligence.
When I say nice, what are you thinking? Intelligence? The beauty ? Sociability ? Or, any other innate characteristic?
No… A study of more than 500 people showed that people associate the term “sympathetic” with adjectives like transparency, sincerity and the ability to understand others.
This kind of adjective describes people who have the social side of their emotional intelligence highly developed.
Moreover, these same people also tend to perform better than those who do not have these qualities.
So when your emotional intelligence is developed, you become more sympathetic in the eyes of others and you are more successful in your life.
So the question you need to ask yourself is not how to become more likable but rather how to develop your emotional intelligence.
Sympathy is not an innate characteristic, it is the result of emotional intelligence.
To develop your emotional intelligence, I suggest you take a look at the typical behavior of people who have a high level.
Indeed, it is by understanding how these people behave that you will be able to invest time and effort in your personal development.
So here are the 10 typical behaviors of emotionally intelligent people:
(There are of course many other behaviors that describe people with high emotional intelligence. For my part, I have chosen the top 10 characteristics).
1. When they say “Hello” to someone, they use the person’s first name.
Your first name is an essential part of your identity and when people use it you feel great.
Thus, sympathetic people make the effort to always use the first name of their interlocutor, and this at each meeting.
You shouldn’t just say the first name of the person you’re talking to when you say “Hello” to them.
You should also use it during your conversation because it gives a feeling of validation to your interlocutor.
If you’re better at remembering faces than first names, practice. Use memory games to make this experience fun.
And, when you meet someone, don’t hesitate to ask them what their name is if you’ve forgotten.
After all, you will need it for your next meeting.
2. When they talk to someone, they completely come off their phone.
Nothing can put off a person than a message in the middle of a conversation or a simple glance at your phone.
When you engage in a discussion, focus all of your energy on the other person.
You will then understand that you benefit much more from this moment when you are really involved.
Moreover, you will succeed in conveying your opinion or your information in a much more effective way.
3. They always leave a strong first impression.
Studies have shown that it only takes a few seconds for people to determine whether they like someone or not.
Then they spend the remainder of the conversation finding justifications for their initial reaction.
It may sound scary! But, now that you know this, you can use this information to your advantage.
Indeed, you can invest a little more effort in your first impression. And, therefore, to gain sympathy.
Besides, the first impression is very much related to positive body language.
Strong posture, a firm handshake, a smile, and open shoulders can help you gain the sympathy of others.
4. Emotionally intelligent people are sincere.
To come off as a nice person, you have to show that you are sincere and honest.
No one likes fake people. People tend to gravitate towards sincere people because they know they can trust them.
It is, in fact, difficult to appreciate someone if you don’t know who he or she really is or how he or she feels.
Friendly people know who they are. They are confident enough to feel comfortable in their own skin.
By focusing on what gives you energy and what makes you happy, you become much more interesting.
However, when you pretend to be someone that you are not, the others understand that you are only trying to please them.
And, that puts them off.
5. They don’t judge anyone.
If you want to be sympathetic in the eyes of others, you have to be open-minded. Indeed, it makes you interesting and approachable.
Honestly, no one wants to have a conversation with someone who already has a strong opinion and doesn’t want to listen to the opinions of others.
Having an open mind is particularly important in the workplace because when you are approachable, you have access to new ideas and you can receive help.
In fact, to eliminate your prejudices and judgment, you have to try to see the world through someone else’s eyes.
But beware ! It does not mean that you have to believe what they believe.
And, that doesn’t mean that you are okay with other people’s way of behaving.
It just means that you detach yourself from your judgment long enough to understand what makes others tilt.
Indeed, it is the only way there is to let people be who they really are.
6. They ask questions.
Listening is the key to success here. Yet, many people make a major mistake in conversations.
Indeed, they are so focused on what they are going to say next or on the effect of the other’s words that they don’t really hear what that person is saying.
The words are clear and precise, but their meaning has been lost. So, to avoid that, you have to ask questions.
People love to know that you are listening to them so a simple question to clarify things can make a difference.
Not only do you show them that you are listening to what they say but also that you are interested in the subject.
You will be surprised to see that you will receive a lot of respect and appreciation just because you ask questions.
7. Positive body language is their greatest asset.
If you manage to be aware of your body language, your expressions and the tone of your voice, you will be able to attract people like flies.
Especially if you do it in a positive way.
So when you use a positive intonation, uncross your arms, and maintain direct eye contact, you are showing that you are interested in what is going on around you.
Positive body language can make all the difference in a conversation. Have you ever heard that what you said wasn’t important but what was important was the way you said it?
This is exactly what we are talking about here!
8. They smile a lot.
No need for a big explanation here… People mimic the body language of the person they’re talking to.
Besides, they do this in a natural and unconscious way. And, if you want to appear sympathetic to others, smile at them during your conversation.
You will realize that unconsciously, they will return the favor to you. And, so they will feel good in your company.
9. They know when it is time for them to open up to others or make physical contact.
If you talk too quickly about your issues and are a little too personal in telling your life story, you will sound like someone who complains all the time.
Friendly people let the other lead the conversation. Thus, they wait for the signal from their interlocutor to know when it is time to open.
Likewise, when you touch someone during a chat, you release oxytocin into their brain.
This neurotransmitter creates a special bond in their brain. Thus, this connects your image to confidence and other positive emotions.
A simple touch of the shoulder, a hug or a friendly handshake is all it takes to release oxytocin.
Obviously, you have to hit the right person in the right way in order to achieve this effect.
If your touch is not desirable or if it is inappropriate, you will get the opposite effect!
You just have to keep in mind that relationships aren’t built on words alone.
They are also built on the feelings the two people have for each other.
So when you touch someone, you show them that you care about them.
10. Emotionally intelligent people don’t try to draw attention to themselves.
In reality, people are turned off by people who are desperate for attention.
In fact, you don’t have to develop a big, outgoing and exuberant personality to be likable in the eyes of others.
You just need to be kind and consider the opinions of others to gain the sympathy of those around you.
When you speak in a concise, friendly and confident manner, you realize that people pay much more attention to you.
You can more easily persuade them this way so stop trying to convince them that you are important.
People around you notice your attitude and respond better to positive behavior.
So when you get attention for an accomplishment, for example, try to redirect that to the people who have helped you succeed.
It might sound a bit cliché to you, but if you do it sincerely, the fact that you care about others and acknowledge their involvement proves that you are humble.
Now, this adjective is the very representation of sympathy.
Passion attracts people
Naturally, people gravitate towards people who are passionate. But, the problem is that very often these same passionate people tend to seem too serious.
Indeed, they are so absorbed in their work that they can give a distant image.
The good thing about nice people is that they’ve managed to strike a balance between their passion and their ability to have fun.
For example, at work, they are serious but friendly. They are successful in doing their jobs because they take advantage of the fact that they can be socially effective in a short period of time.
Emotionally intelligent people don’t waste time with gossip or superficial discussions at work.
They prefer to focus on meaningful interactions with their colleagues. Thus, they remember what each of them has ever told them.
Which is proof that these people are just as important as work.
Ultimately, friendly people are unique and invaluable. They succeed in being accepted by any entourage.
And, they create an atmosphere of harmony at work. Emotionally intelligent people manage to bring out the best in everyone.
Besides, they always seem to be the ones having the most fun!
So here are the talents you need to add to your repertoire if you want to be likeable to people.