We are the army of selfies, of those who tan with the iPhone,” said a hit song of the summer a few years ago. The selfie has become a new way of photographing, widespread among young and old. This is not a simple self-timer. But the attempt to document the protagonist’s life in real time, promoting it among a vast number of virtual recipients. A phenomenon that is part of the now widespread socialization of the private sector. Even very personal aspects of everyday life become social.
Selfo ergo sum
The affective function attributed to the network, which guarantees contact, closeness and sharing with one’s circle of friends, contributes to overcoming the sense of modesty. All of this fits into the broader framework of the society of narcissism. Every expressive need is implicitly legitimate. The engine of creative and artistic processes is no longer the sublimation of guilt but the need to develop, grow and realize the Self. The experience immortalized in the self-portrait becomes worth living if recognized and appreciated by the other’s gaze. The fashion of selfies well testifies to today’s human frailty and the need for admiration. For teenagers of the new millennium, encouraged to seek the path of their own personal success, the explosion of selfies reveals the fear of not being seen and of being forgotten.
Dying of popularity
The most radical expression is that of extreme selfies. Actions of this type are erroneously interpreted as a transgressive or omnipotent signal. The limit challenge has always existed in adolescence. And it is closely linked to the task of mentalizing the body and its new endowments. However, it is the most fragile and vulnerable children who, more than others, seek out and stage striking actions, extreme gestures, where the need to gain visibility and admiration prevails over their own safety. Everything, in order to gain popularity and success among the militants of the network.
Discomfort and experimentation
In summary, we can frame the use of selfies in adolescence as one of the two extremes of a continuum. A continuum in which, on the one hand, there are young people in such difficulty with their bodies that they shut themselves up at home and cannot even access the network as a territory for experimentation. On the other hand, there are young people who overexpose their image on the internet, risking their own physical safety or coming across criticisms that are a source of profound humiliation, mortification and shame.
In the physiology of growth, the selfie can take on an evolutionary meaning. It contributes, in fact, to the construction of identity through the experimentation of different representations of oneself, today increasingly handed over to the mediation of the internet. With care and dedication, original looks and new connotations of one’s image can be chosen. Posting test selfies online prepares you for a real meeting with your peers. The return gaze of the peer group, measured with likes and followers, refines their skills in taking care of the body self. The mirroring function that passes through the network contributes to the construction of the image of oneself within the more general identity process.
Adult counterculture
The narcissistic society in which children and teenagers grew up was promoted and supported by adults. Censoring teenagers when in the name of the need for confirmation they commit dangerous gestures, such as extreme selfies, is a belated action. We should think of a broad and prospective counterculture operation, involving the whole educating community, capable of proposing alternatives to the society of appearing, of success and of the search for popularity beyond all limits.
Matteo Lancini
Psychologist and psychotherapist. President of the “ Minotauro ”Foundationof Milan. Lecturer at the Department of Psychology of the Milano-Bicocca University. Author of numerous publications on adolescence, the most recent: Social withdrawal in adolescents. The loneliness of a hyper-connected generation (Raffaello Cortina, 2019). What our kids need. New teenagers explained to parents, teachers, adults. (Utet, 2020).
