All existence dances, except man; all existence moves in a very relaxed way; movement certainly exists, but it is deeply relaxed.
Trees grow, birds chirp, rivers flow, stars rotate: everything happens in a very relaxed way.
There is no hurry, fury, worry or waste: this only happens to the man who has fallen victim to his own mind “.
We deal with stress every day – in personal relationships, at work, with health, finances … in short, stress represents an important component of our life, there is no doubt.
And we are well aware of the negative effects caused by stress: it makes us unhappy, less open to interpersonal relationships, affects our health, causes fatigue, destabilizes mental balance and increases anxiety levels.
Let’s try to understand together how we can get rid of stress.
What are we fighting against
Why do we experience stress, are we anxious or do we feel overwhelmed?
The answer is simple, perhaps even banal: because we want the world to go in a certain way , in accordance with our plans and our desires.
And when this does not happen we experience frustration , discontent and, precisely, stress.
The reality is that what happens is often beyond our control , unplanned events occur, and things don’t go as planned or imagined.
And that’s the way the world is – ultimately, we don’t experience stress because the world is messy and chaotic, but because we want it to be different from what it is.
We idealize how others should behave, how we should be, how everything around us should be.
The problem is not the ideals themselves, but our attachment to these ideals. It is this attachment that causes us stress.
The good news is that we can let go of our attachment. And in doing so, we also let go of our stress.
How to let go of stress
Let’s assume you are experiencing a stressful situation right now.
Something is not going as you wish , the situations around you are confusing or contradictory, someone is not behaving as you wish, you are worried about something that is happening.
The first step is to enter your body and become fully aware of how you are perceiving stress on a physical level .
Try to feel fully and deeply the physical sensation that stress is causing you.
Get in total contact with the effects that stress is having on you in your body .
The second step is to become aware of how you are idealizing the reality around you.
What is causing you stress? You have your ideal about what the world should be like, how others should behave, what should happen.
But the reality and the people around you are not respecting your ideal. Things are not going as you wish , as you have prefigured and idealized them in your mind.
Become aware of this misalignment between your ideals and your expectations on the one hand and the reality of the facts on the other.
Note the story you are telling yourself : “things should not be like this, this person should not behave this way, it must not rain right now” , and so on.
What do you say to yourself? Does this type of story sound familiar to you?
These idealizations and what you say to yourself are the cause of stress, anxiety, fear, a sense of anguish.
All of this was created by your mind . Your mind created your idealizations and the stories you tell yourself.
The truth is, you are sabotaging yourself .
But there is nothing you have to blame yourself for.
The important thing is to recognize this mechanism.
And the good news is that if you created it, you can also let it go .
The third step is to let go and simply be.
How would you feel right now if you hadn’t idealized your reality and if your mind wasn’t telling you how things should go?
You would be at peace .
You would be present right now.
You would be free.
You could relax , open your mind beyond your personal concern, and simply be, exist.
This is an open state that you can enter at any time.
Just start becoming aware of your feelings right now – what your body is feeling, what your emotions are, how you are reacting to what is happening around you.
Become aware of the wonderful people who are in your life. Realize how surprising it is to be alive in this moment, what a gift to have sight, hearing, taste, to have a body. What a privilege, what a joy!
This does not mean that you must be grateful and joyful at all times, but this freedom to abandon the idealizations and what you tell yourself in your mind, and be at peace … is something that is always available , always possible.