The best reason to stop complaining is: knowing that it doesn’t help you. Because 95% of the time, the only thing that motivates complaining is that you think you’re right. And that doesn’t allow you to be assertive. It simply serves to confirm that something is going wrong and does not let you see what is really happening. You only see that there is something that does not convince you. Maybe at that moment all you need is someone to tell you that ” it is not your fault, you are not the culprit.” That doesn’t help.
But, if you really want to stop complaining, the first step is to make sure that the complaint helps you with something. Because if that regret has no value and is something that in 10 minutes you will be able to solve, how does it benefit you? In which you are 10 minutes pissed off. And obsessed with yourself. Well, if that’s what it is, complain, although I don’t think you’ll be satisfied.
Most of the time, the problem does not lie with the complaint as it is not substantiated. The problem in many cases lies in the impotence of not being able to do what we want to do at that moment.
Think about when we drive: we don’t stop complaining. We complain about how people drive but when they tell us something … that’s a hecatomb! It’s like no one has the right to tell you something if you’re driving! The forms are lost and the gross and rude that is in you comes out. Maybe you are guilty but who is going to tell you anything?
And that is the experience I had once that I was the offender. The other person scolded me. After seeing that he was right, I apologized and accepted that he had acted badly. The man, a bit upset because I hadn’t argued, thanked me and offered to go have a coffee. According to what he told me, he had been a transporter for 15 years and had left because of the stress he was carrying on the road. We hit it off and he was the one who inspired me to write this article. He told me that we always tend to complain and the only thing we get is to get in a bad mood.
Wow, I was inspired by him and another person I heard from today:
- I’ve been doing other things all day and I have a lot of papers on the table.
And whose fault is it? It is certainly not from your coworker who has asked you to do your job and help her with some of your responsibility. Nor is it your fault for having a lot of work but do not take it with others and above all do not use the complaint to please yourself or justify yourself that you cannot do other things. You stay with that. That you’ve been doing other things and that you have more to do. It’s so hard to say something like: no problem, let me look at how I fix all this and see when I can get on with this.
From now on, think that if you have to complain, do it but don’t complain about vice. Do it if it really works. There is a big difference between a complaint for improvement or constructive and a complaint for a worse or negative . The one that is to improve helps and enables you to continue with your growth. The refusal nullifies your options for reasoning, understanding and correction.