Why doesn’t my dog ​​want to be with me?

If you have just welcomed a dog into your home, but it seems that it does not want to know anything about you or you already live with a dog and you have noticed that it has started to distance itself for no apparent reason, you must surely feel rejected and insecure with your relationship with your dog. It gives you the feeling that he no longer loves you as before and that worries you, right?

This situation can be quite uncomfortable and generally has various explanations and solutions. For this reason, if you want to know why you but do not want to be with you , at Animal Expert we want to help you understand your friend and know how to act.

You may also be interested: My cat is very possessive of me, what should I do?


  1. Why doesn’t my dog ​​want to spend time with me?
  2. My dog ​​doesn’t love me like before
  3. My dog ​​does not want to sleep with me
  4. What do I do if my dog ​​doesn’t love me?

Why doesn’t my dog ​​want to spend time with me?

It is well known that dogs are the most sociable and affectionate animals. It is not for nothing that they have earned the title of the best friend of the human being, and that is that throughout the history of domestic dogs they have helped us in carrying out different tasks and have known how to convey all their love when we interact with them. However, we cannot generalize and attribute the same characteristics to all dogs, since each of them has its own personality.and motivations, depending on their genetics (often determined by race), the environment in which they have grown up and the learning they have acquired throughout their lives. For this reason, it is not uncommon to see some dogs more affectionate than others. There are dogs that are constantly on top of you and others that shy away from all kinds of physical contact.

There are different signs that can give you to understand that your dog avoids being with you because it is part of his character , like going to another room when there are people, hiding, preferring to be alone … But it can also be the case that he does not Be a shy dog, but this attitude only has it with you and gives you the feeling that your dog loves your partner, your children more, for example. In this case, we would understand that the problem is only related to you. For this reason, once you have looked at whether they reject all people or only discriminate against you, we can try to find out what this situation may be due to. Here are the most common causes that can explain why your dog doesn’t want to be with you:

1. Your way of relating to him is not the most appropriate

It is quite usual that our dog develops a rather elusive character due to the way we behave with him. Many times, we tend to act excessively thinking that being dogs, they are not affected by excesses of affection or attention, for example, caressing them, hugging them, holding them in their arms … Now, despite the fact that generally our affection is well received Because of our furry, many times we can be really overwhelming for them.

We must think that, despite being dogs and adapting very well to us, these animals do not usually maintain the same physical contact with each other as we do and are often perceived as an “aggression” or invasion of the living space in which they feel cornered. In these cases, our dogs often communicate this to us through body language and calm signals , with which they ask us to stop and respect their limits . However, many times out of ignorance we are not aware of this form of communication and, as a consequence, our dog could end up developing a rather fleeting and even aggressive behavior in some cases.

On the other hand, an education based on negative reinforcement, punishments or screaming could also cause, as a consequence, that your dog does not want to be with you because it relates to negative stimuli for him.

2. He just met you

If you have recently adopted your dog, it is natural that he is still not completely confident with you. Some more timid dogs need a longer period of time to adjust to their new family and learn new habits . In addition, many times we do not even know the past of our furry, we do not know what kind of learning he has done or if he has been mistreated, a fact that would justify his character being much more grim than a dog that has been raised since childhood in a safe home.

3. You do not receive the necessary care

It is also possible that your dog has problems when it comes to relating to you because he is not comfortable, that is, his welfare is not covered . As caregivers, it is our responsibility to take care of all the specific care that our dogs need, including food, physical and emotional security, and physical and mental entertainment. On the contrary, when one of these pillars limps, our dog is ill and manifests it through behavioral disorders that reflect his state of stress and frustration and can give us the feeling that he does not like us, for example, if he barks or growls at us every time we pay attention to them.

My dog ​​doesn’t love me like before

You may have enjoyed a good relationship with your dog, but now you have the feeling that he has stopped loving you. Your dog may want to be alone and may even show you clear rejection. The reasons why this sudden change could have happened are the following:

1. You have had a negative experience

It is frequent to live stressful situations with our furry, which can create a negative cause-effect association with us. That is, if for example we have taken our dog for a walk and he has suffered an accident (such as another dog has attacked him), it would not be surprising that he is confused and understood that we have rushed him into that situation and, for Therefore, fear has caught us. Similar would be the case of inadvertently hurting him (stepping on his tail, wrongly picking him up in his arms …), a fact that would relate to relating to that negative experience.

Similarly, if we educate our dog by squabbling, yelling and physical pain , it is not strange that he is afraid of us and does not like spending time with us. The vast majority of times, we tend to get disproportionately angry and not effectively communicate what to correct. In addition, we do not offer him more suitable alternatives to behaviors that are natural to him. This situation of misunderstanding generates a feeling of detachment and mistrust towards us. Therefore, if you have scolded your dog in an exaggerated way and, as of this moment, your dog does not want to be with you or you have noticed that he does not love you as before, it is likely that this is the reason.

2. A significant change has occurred in your environment

There are dogs that can become really susceptible to changes in their environment, changing their mood and being unsure if something really significant has happened, such as a move or the arrival of a new member of the family.

3. not feeling well

Sudden behavioral changes in animals, specifically in the dog, are a clear indication that something is wrong. If you observe that your dog prefers to be alone and, in addition, he manifests other behaviors such as stopping eating, he does not want to go for a walk, he licks excessively …, you should worry and take him to the vet as soon as possible so that he can rule out that he is not suffering no pain or clinical pathology .

My dog ​​does not want to sleep with me

It is common for dogs to want to sleep with their human companions or with other dogs, as they feel comfortable and safe. However, this does not happen in all dogs and, for this reason, it is natural that you think that your dog rejects you or does not love you if you notice that he does not want to sleep next to you.

Now, if in your daily life your furry shows you that he wants to be with you and you have not identified any of the points described above, the fact that your dog does not want to sleep with you does not necessarily have to mean that he does not love you, it could be due for the following reasons:

1. It is not comfortable in your bed

Your bed may not be the most appropriate for your dog, it may be too soft and cause a feeling of instability or it could be too small for both of you and, although you are comfortable, your dog sits annoying every time you move.

There are many reasons why your partner may not like your bed, also, if he has his own bed to rest, he may prefer it and is more suitable for him. So don’t take it personally!

2. You feel more comfortable sleeping alone

It is also not unusual that your furry simply prefers to sleep alone, as he is more comfortable, for example, if you move around a lot at night, if you have a tendency to hug him like a stuffed animal (which he does not have to like) and even if it is very hot sleeping next to you, especially in summer. Still, it doesn’t have to be loved! Look at how he behaves with you throughout the day, he will surely show you his affection, despite not wanting to sleep with you.

3. It is part of his character

It may also be the case that your dog is rather independent and does not need to be by your side to feel protected. It could even be he who wants to protect you and, for this reason, be vigilant in his environment while you sleep.

What do I do if my dog ​​doesn’t love me?

To improve your relationship with your dog, it will be necessary to first identify why it does not want to spend time with you, due to the different causes that can cause this behavior. Once the reason is identified, you can apply one or the other tips.

1. Give it time to adjust

As we have previously described, if the rejection is due to the fact that it has recently arrived at your home or that it is a rather scary dog, you should give it time to adapt to its environment and meet its new family. You’ll need to avoid forcing fearful situations and inviting them to come closer with rewards , calm displays of affection, and the use of a soft tone of voice . If, in addition, you have observed that he loves to play with a toy, encourage him to do it with you, avoiding sudden movements if you see that he feels uncomfortable.

2. Learn to understand their body language

Once you know the different signals that your dog gives you to communicate if he is sad, happy or stressed, it will be easier for you to distinguish when you can interact with him and when he prefers to have his space. You will therefore be able to understand when your dog is not uncomfortable and you will know when he is receptive and wants to spend gratifying moments with you, whether it is playing, walking or pampering.

3. Be patient

Learning to manage problem situations with your dog from a positive approach and from a calm state of mind will be especially beneficial in your relationship with him. On the one hand, you will not become a threatening stimulus to him, but on the contrary, since the use of positive reinforcement will make him see you as someone really nice. On the other hand, you will make your friend more secure and confident, since he will be able to understand you better and will be clearer about the guidelines you give him.

When dogs receive some kind of fights, most of the time, they are not able to understand the reason for the anger, which usually causes confusion and makes them feel uncomfortable.

4. Identify what your dog likes

Each individual is unique and, for this reason, not all dogs are motivated by the same thing. For example, your dog may be rather active and prefer to spend time playing and not stretched out on the couch, or your dog may be rather calm, and not showing an iota of interest when you throw the ball at him. Identifying your furry’s tastes and spending quality time with him will be more than beneficial for him to gain confidence and attachment.

5. Find the source of your discomfort

As we have discussed, your dog may not want to be with you and show a more hostile character because its welfare is not completely covered. You should, therefore, find out about the specific needs of your dog (such as the exercise it needs to do or the environmental enrichment ), to take care of it in the most appropriate way.

Taking it to the vet is also advisable, since a pathology or pain could be the main cause that explains why your dog does not love you as before or rejects you if he has distanced himself from you.


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