The difference between dressing up for yourself or others

Did you know that our way of dressing reflects our emotional and psychic state a little? Yes, it does!

Observe yourself and your variations in the way you dress and dress. On the days when she is most discouraged, she doesn’t have much spirit or disposition to think about a nice combination, to put a decent lipstick in her mouth, maybe not even fix her hair. But on those days that animation is your partner and the day seems happier, because “nothing is capable” of shaking your state of mind, the clothes are tidier on the body, lipstick, mascara and a blush are not weight, but part from you. Did you notice how much our personal presentation is linked to how we are inside?

Illustrative photo: Wesley Almeida /

The sense of grooming changes when we meet and love each other

Well then! If we reflect externally through clothes, shoes, make-up and hair, what we are experiencing in our inner universe, the question remains: “Who am I getting dressed for? For me or for others? ”.

A very good question to ask, because if, throughout this reflection, you realize that if your image is connected to the other, it is probably because you may not even know who you really are yet! Because if I dress for the other, I am living from the eyes of the other and not from mine. What can generate psychological distress and emotional dependencies . Of course, it cannot be denied that there is a “need” for the other’s gaze. We do want to be seen. Especially women, because they have a greater need than men. However, it is a desire to be seen, noticed, to exist in someone’s life, and not to dress as the other approves or disapproves.

Never lose your shine

How many people, when experiencing the end of a loving relationship or even the breaking of a friendship, report having realized how disfigured they felt during this relationship! Because they heard that they were extravagant in their way of smiling, that their clothes were old-fashioned, that they needed this or that … And in the end, they realized that it was no longer their identity that was being reflected, but the identity projected by the other. This is the main point of this  question.

We do need to adapt to environments and places. You can’t go in sneakers, jeans and a knit shirt at a wedding. Just like you can’t go to the amusement park in high heels and party dress. The harmony and balance must exist, but, together, an identity and a healthy emotional state, not to live in dependence on an approval that may never exist.

How do you see yourself?

Another good aspect of this reflection is to think about how you see your image. When looking at yourself in the mirror, do you like the reflected image? Are you happy with this image?

If the answer is yes, I am immensely happy to be able to get to this point. But if not, I invite you to think about yourself, about your image. And ask the following questions: Have you been looking at you? Are you careful? Have you been happy with the style of clothing you are wearing? Do you have your own style?

Read more:
:: Accelerated thinking syndrome, what is it?
:: Why am I the one who needs to change and be better?
:: How much does your inner peace cost?
:: Are my feelings real?

Such questions can be the beginning for those who wish to make this way back, to get ready for you, because no one better than you should know what, in fact, portrays your identity and personality, your values ​​and culture. It all goes together. Knowing who you are, your values ​​and lifestyle, you will certainly stop “begging” the look of approval from the other and will stop being a mannequin in the hands of someone who may not know you. Start here, draw your profile, invest in it and be happy with your image.


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