Do you know that phrase “Who loves, takes care.” Well, it is widely used as a justification by people who are jealous of their partners. But it does not reflect reality.
Of course, whoever loves, protects their partner. However, this feeling of protection is very far from the feeling of possession. When jealousy attacks become violent and destructive, attitudes must be assessed.
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When a case of exaggerated jealousy is detected, we almost always blame the situation on the partner, in his actions. But, in fact, the issue is internal and must be worked on by the person who carries such feelings, that is, with us.
But how about you, can you handle the jealousy that your husband or boyfriend feels for you?
Control jealousy and improve your relationship
In our post today we will discuss how you should deal with your partner’s jealousy. Some simple attitudes can improve the relationship, make it healthier and especially charming, as every love relationship should be. Follow and learn more!
- Maintain a routine of frequent dialogues
Within a relationship, there is no escape from dialogue. Many criticize the so-called ‘DRs’, but without them, the relationship breaks down.
Imagine the following scenario: you know your partner is jealous and needs to change, but does he understand the scale of the problem? The only way he can find out is by talking to you and, of course, with you exposing the problem.
Seek dialogue at the right time, and be available to help you control your feelings, fears and desires!
- Know the origin of jealousy
Of course, for a woman, her partner’s exaggerated jealousy will never be founded. However, it is necessary to analyze the situation well and determine if there are really reasons for jealousy, or if it is just something created by the imagination of your husband or boyfriend.
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It’s worth putting yourself in the other’s shoes, too. Ask yourself if jealousy is justified, or if your partner is overdoing it.
A good way to understand the source of jealousy and talk to family and close friends. If they, who are out of the relationship, warn that there is something wrong with their activities, it is worth reviewing their choices. Otherwise, it is recommended to have an open dialogue with the partner.
- Enforce your wants and desires
It is quite common to see women totally changing their lifestyles because of their partners’ jealousy. But this is wrong. Women (or men) must change for anyone. When your partner met you, did you act in exactly the same way? So he must accept you like this.
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Of course, there are exceptions. But unless your actions result in something totally damaging to the relationship, maintain your autonomy and wills towards your partner. Remember that when you started a relationship, you chose to share a life together, accepting your strengths and weaknesses. A courtship or marriage is not only about good times, all obstacles must be faced together!
- Avoid situations that trigger excessive jealousy
Have you ever stopped to think if you don’t really give your partner reasons to be jealous? Is it a very close relationship that creates distrust with an ex-boyfriend, or does he never answer his cell phone when he calls you? If so, it is worth reviewing your concepts.
If you know that a certain attitude is not so nice and, at the same time, opens the door to uncontrollable crises of jealousy, avoid it. So, in addition to maintaining peace in your relationship, you do not wear yourself out with unnecessary arguments.
- Don’t argue
When one of the partners is jealous for whatever reason, minimal issues can generate uncontrollable discussions. In this sense, a good way out is to avoid arguments in the heat of emotion. Even if your partner’s thinking is unfounded, take a deep breath, wait for the irritation to pass and choose the best time to discuss the issue.
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Do you also feel jealous? Learn how to gain self-confidence
If in addition to living with the jealousy your partner feels about you, you are also a jealous woman, we have another problem. Here, the big tip is to gain self-confidence and raise your self-esteem. Being well with yourself, it will be much simpler to overcome insecurity, to control emotions and to overcome excessive jealousy.
To help you, we have listed some simple steps below that will make you become a more confident woman and, in addition, contribute to the health of your love relationship. Check it out:
- Understand your insecurity: what makes you most jealous? Your companion’s outings with other friends? His friendship with other women? Intimacy with your own family? Reflect on these issues and understand the reasons that make you feel so jealous.
- Assume that you are jealous! Everyone around you can claim that you are too jealous, but you always deny it. This is very harmful. If others perceive this characteristic, it is certainly because you take actions that are consistent with it. So, if you really feel jealous in an exaggerated way, assume this condition for your partner and, especially, for you.
- Map your past relationships. Many psychology professionals relate the jealousy of a current relationship to something experienced in previous relationships. If your relationship with your ex was very troubled, you may experience reflections of it today. It is essential to understand that the other relationship was in the past, and the same occurrences will not be repeated with the current partner!
- Value yourself. When you are feeling good about yourself, there will rarely be time left for jealousy. This will not be a priority. A good way to circumvent this issue is to value yourself, highlighting your qualities and skills, getting to know yourself better. You can do this by enrolling in a painting course, a running group or a dance class, for example. Explore activities that bring you pleasure and, above all, make you feel useful and fulfilled.
- Don’t hold a grudge! The worst thing you can do is to shut up and accumulate hurt, anger and disappointment. Whenever you experience some of these feelings towards your partner, tell them. Dialogue is a powerful preventive for the health of your relationship. Remember, too, that your partner will not be able to guess your thoughts and, therefore, will hardly help you to overcome the situation.
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We hope that our tips today will help you to reflect on excessive jealousy, both felt by you and your partner. In addition, it is necessary to understand when jealousy becomes something destructive, turning the relationship into an abusive one. Here on the website we have a post dedicated to this subject ( How to know if you are in an abusive relationship ) that is worth checking out.
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