Cowardice is almost always rewarded, but courage is a virtue that is most often punished by death.
Ernest Renan
There are such forms of human behavior that have always been inherent in a certain part of people and which, with all the desire, cannot be abandoned without disfiguring the very nature of man. We can attribute cowardice to one of these forms, which in one way or another is inherent in all healthy people, but in some of them it can stand out especially strongly and therefore cause a negative attitude towards itself. Of course, cowardice is an unsightly form of behavior and often harmful to those who demonstrate it. It is believed that being a coward is bad, because such a person is overcome by fear, which either pushes him to stupid acts, or vice versa, fetters his actions. But in this article I will not be so categorical in relation to this kind of mental weakness, but I will look at it more broadly to see in it and show you positive and even beneficial aspects. It is this approach to this form of behavior and state of mind that has allowed and allows me to help people who turn to me for help with this problem. I hope this article will also help someone who needs it, take a fresh look at their cowardice in order to use it for their own benefit, in cases where it is impossible to become a little bolder.
What is cowardice?
Briefly about what cowardice is. Shyness is the inability to cope with your fear, the inability to step over it when necessary. Or you can also say that this inability to competently respond to fear. Suppose there is a situation where you can and should do something in a certain way to solve a problem, a task, and get something or get something, and a person acts differently or is completely inactive due to his cowardice. That is, in fact, he does not behave quite adequately to the circumstances and therefore deprives himself of certain opportunities or does not solve important problems, thereby only exacerbating them. But, it should also be noted that in some situations, cowardly behavior can help a person avoid unnecessary troubles and dangers, it saves him from unnecessary problems. Below I will explain
Attitude to cowardice
First of all, let’s say that cowardice in our society is unreasonably despised, reproached and presented exclusively as weakness. This, I will tell you, is not completely objective, from the point of view of nature, the position of people in relation to this form of human behavior, it is more cultural, because we are taught from childhood that being a coward is bad. Of course, cowardly people are often not very well arranged in life, so it is difficult to discern any positive aspects in their attitude to it. However, a coward is not necessarily a weak person who never achieves anything because of his cowardly behavior. He can apply this model of behavior to avoid various threats, running away from dangers, difficulties, problems, instead of fighting them, for the sake of his survival and well-being. He can even defend his interests in this way. Here you just need to remember that fear drives a coward, and this is a very powerful incentive, and if you connect your head to it, you can come up with a lot of profitable combinations as an answer to various challenges that other people face us. Where a brave one can act recklessly, a cowardly person will exercise caution and discretion, and will not expose himself to unjustified risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. and this is a very powerful incentive, and if you connect your head to it, you can come up with a lot of profitable combinations as an answer to the various challenges that life and other people give us. Where a brave one can act recklessly, a cowardly person will exercise caution and discretion, and will not expose himself to unjustified risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. and this is a very powerful incentive, and if you connect your head to it, you can come up with a lot of profitable combinations as an answer to the various challenges that life and other people give us. Where a brave one can act recklessly, a cowardly person will exercise caution and discretion, and will not expose himself to unjustified risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. you can come up with a lot of profitable combinations as an answer to the various challenges that other people face us. Where a brave one can act recklessly, a cowardly person will exercise caution and discretion, and will not expose himself to unjustified risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. you can come up with a lot of profitable combinations as an answer to the various challenges that other people face us. Where a brave one can act recklessly, a cowardly person will exercise caution and discretion, and will not expose himself to unjustified risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. and does not expose himself to undue risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result. and does not expose himself to undue risk. So in some situations, cowardly behavior helps, but in some it interferes. The main thing is not just to be afraid of something and, as a result, give in to the influence of emotions, but to sort through various combinations of your actions in response to what causes fear – that’s what it’s important to be able to do for cowardly people. Are you afraid to climb a mountain – go around it. You do not have to overcome fear – it is important for you to achieve the desired result.
A negative attitude to cowardice is explained by the fact that people do not like those who do not take responsibility for solving some problems on themselves, who do not risk their interests, health and even life in the fight against various threats, which means that it will have to be done them, these people. But you don’t want to. I want someone else to be a hero in dangerous and difficult situations, and you just benefitted from it. Therefore, bold, but dangerous, risky behavior is approved, and more prudent and cautious behavior, perceived as cowardly, is condemned. In most cases, this is an unconscious moment in people’s attitude to cowardice; it is connected with the selfish interests of a person who wants someone else to solve various problems for him and sacrifice something. For example, if you throw a bunch of grenades under a tank, you’re a hero, brave man, you, or rather your behavior, is praised. Why? Because you did it, you sacrificed your life for the sake of other people, so they don’t have to do this – to part with their life. But the coward will not do this – he will be saved himself. So someone else will have to do it for him – to sacrifice his life for the sake of others. Naturally, nobody wants to do this, so cowardly people are exposed in a negative light. Such, if I may say so, selfish interests are at stake for us in the question of condemning cowardice. It is all about our egoism. So someone else will have to do it for him – to sacrifice his life for the sake of others. Naturally, nobody wants to do this, so cowardly people are exposed in a negative light. Such, if I may say so, selfish interests are at stake for us in the matter of condemning cowardice. It is all about our egoism. So someone else will have to do it for him – to sacrifice his life for the sake of others. Naturally, nobody wants to do this, so cowardly people are exposed in a negative light. Such, if I may say so, selfish interests are at stake for us in the question of condemning cowardice. It is all about our egoism.
You may ask how people can praise courage in others for the sake of their selfish interests, without realizing it, if almost every person wants to be seen as a brave, strong, courageous person. Here, friends, we must distinguish between the desire of people to look bold, strong, courageous and their ability to be like that. Of course, there are and always have been people who act boldly, risky, show courage and courage and get a certain reward for it, and with it recognition and respect from other people. But far from always courage leads a person to victories, more often leads to her cunning. Not courage, I believe, but the cunning of the city takes. And then, when a person comes to a certain success, achieves something, he begins to compose beautiful legends about himself, exposing himself in the most favorable light. Often cowards do this, who, with the help of cunning and cunning, were able to succeed in something, to come to something, for example, to power. Or a person can expose himself as a hero, in fact, not being such, but since it is not possible to prove the opposite, he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. who with the help of cunning and deceit were able to succeed in something, to come to something, for example, to power. Or a person can expose himself as a hero, in fact, not being such, but since it is not possible to prove the opposite, he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. who with the help of cunning and deceit were able to succeed in something, to come to something, for example, to power. Or a person can expose himself as a hero, in fact, not being such, but since it is not possible to prove the opposite, he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. for example, to power. Or a person can expose himself as a hero, in fact, not being such, but since it is not possible to prove the opposite, he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. for example, to power. Or a person can expose himself as a hero, in fact, not being such, but since it is not possible to prove the opposite, he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. then he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. then he can tell a lot of good things about himself. For example, while some rushed under bullets and tanks, others sat in headquarters, slept in hospitals, and then, when everything had settled down, they began to poison stories about how brave and courageous they were and how many heroic acts they had committed. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others. Here, truth does not play an important role, but eloquence and the ability to lie lie. So, wanting to be courageous and courageous and being one is completely different thing. And that is why most people want to look brave, but let the chestnuts from the fire carry others.
There is another reason for the negative attitude of people to cowardice – this is their own cowardice, which prevents them from defending their interests. Indeed, in other people, we often despise what we hate in ourselves. And our own weakness is especially unpleasant for us, we feel genetic aversion to it. Although, those other people may not worry at all because of the problems that bother us and that we see in him. Roughly speaking, if you are a coward and you feel bad because of this, this does not mean at all that another coward is as bad as you. He can be satisfied with everything and he does not want to become bolder at all, he already learned how to solve his problems well. You can despise him, seeing your reflection in him, but this will be exclusively your position, your vision of another person.
There is nothing to say about beliefs that may not have real evidence in life. A person can be convinced of anything, this is his weakness and strength. If you were told from childhood that it was bad to be a coward, then you need to look in her, in cowardice, for something good, useful, necessary, as I do in this article to form my own attitude towards her. Then it may come to understand that, yes, being a coward is bad in some situations. But there are situations when you need to be a coward or have to. After all, for example, if you are accused of cowardice because you don’t want to jump from the bridge into the river, although others did it, and you don’t even know how to swim, then honestly, you better admit your cowardice than try it to refute by deciding to do what they are calling you to. Such courage is useless to you. Remember as I once did, there is productive and ineffectual behavior in this life, one leads to victories and success, the other to defeats and failures. And whether it’s bold or cowardly, right or wrong, good or bad, from someone’s point of view, these are less significant factors for evaluating it.
Courage and cowardice
The foregoing, of course, does not mean that cowardice is useful and necessary, and that it is necessary to put up with it, not trying to become more courageous. Just here you need to understand, for those who suffer because of it, that with it you can achieve your goals. And when people come to me with such a problem, when they complain about their cowardly behavior, which prevents them from living normally, I always look at their capabilities, their life experience, their strengths and weaknesses, before offering them various solutions to this problem. Not all people can just take and become bold and courageous, even gradually and even with good mentoring and due diligence. I would even say many cannot do this. Therefore, some need to learn to behave more boldly in some situations, others in others,
For example, some people cannot behave bravely in conflict situations and, given their mental capabilities, they should not do this so as not to aggravate their situation. Because their character does not allow them to be what they ideally should be in conflicts. They will not be able to play an unnatural role for them for a long time, they will not be able to respond with blow to blow. Therefore, in order not to break oneself and not waste a lot of time on mastering the role of a bold, arrogant, strong, and when an aggressive person is needed, it is easier for them to resort to all kinds of tricks and use them to achieve their goals. Therefore, I never aspired to all whom I helped to cope with cowardice, to make, so to speak, cool, because all can not be cool. But here everyone can become more productive, successful, practical. And if you, being a coward, nevertheless, you achieve your goals, then why should you worry about it, just do what you can do and get a certain reward for it. The main thing is not to become limp, not to do nothing. Shyness must be supplemented by the flexibility of the mind so as not to lose because of it.
Of course, in the long run, any person can be changed beyond recognition, working with him competently, persistently, individually. But we must understand that under the long term, we can consider a very long period. Therefore, it is much wiser to learn first of all to do with what you already have, even if it is unsightly cowardice that makes you afraid of everything.
And if we talk about courage, then, no doubt, it often benefits the one who shows it, compared with cowardice. But one must understand that courage and cowardice are different sides of the same coin. Being courageous always and everywhere is also bad; you can fly great in situations where brave behavior is inappropriate. Therefore, the point here is more about a person’s assessment of a particular threat, danger, risk, and not a model of behavior. Just to be courageous, without taking into account external factors and your capabilities, means being reckless. Thus, it turns out that one extreme makes people afraid of everything, and the other, not afraid of anything, which can lead to absolutely unjustified risk and loss of everything and everything. Therefore, to show cowardice or courage and at the same time benefit from one or another of your decision, can a person who knows how to assess risks, who understands his capabilities and most importantly, knows how to control his condition, and does not act out of habit. But this is from the point of view of the mind. But from the point of view of emotions and feelings, which most of us are guided in most cases, human behavior is less controlled and deliberate. It is in most cases stereotyped, based on years of formed habits. Therefore, I sometimes see that a person is not really a coward, but considers himself to be just because he used to be used to behaving like cowards, used to be afraid, although he has nothing to fear, he’s used to retreat, although he may well defend their interests in certain situations. In other words, some people do not understand themselves well enough and therefore experience problems with the same cowardice, or with courage, if they are reckless.
To better understand why sometimes people make mistakes at their own expense, let’s talk about what makes people cowardly and how then this state of mind, body and mind becomes familiar to them.
What makes people cowardly?
So, what makes people cowardly and how then to change this behavioral and worldview model of attitude towards life, leading it to a more adequate and effective state? Here, friends, it is necessary to understand that a person always adheres to a model of behavior that in most cases allows him to get something or avoid something. In simple terms, a person wants to get pleasure, but to avoid pain. And he probes the boundaries of his capabilities, the boundaries of what is permitted, with the help of one or another model of behavior. Usually, initially, this is a selfish model of behavior, the manifestation of which is arrogance, aggression, whims, urging other people to do whatever the person wants at all costs. And if such impudent, aggressive, assertive behavior allows him to achieve his goals, then, of course,
And in our case we are talking about cowardly behavior, to which a person resorts forcedly. This is because most of his attempts to display bold, courageous, and proactive behavior ended in failure. Life and other people punished him for his courage, so he was forced to choose a model of behavior that allows him to avoid pain, fight fear and even get something from this world. Shyness helps a coward survive. Whether it is adequate or not, this is another matter.
Therefore, if this world somehow broke a man and suppressed, not allowing him to be courageous, active, courageous, arrogant, aggressive, then he can only be a coward who can somehow protect himself from various threats, even somehow he can achieve his modest goals by adapting to circumstances. Think, what else can be done in this case, how to adapt to this world, if not with the help of cowardice? If in a person’s life there was a lot of violence, cruelty, pain, suffering, because of which he constantly felt fear, if a person does not have an inner core that does not appear on its own, it needs to be developed if this person does not have the ability to demonstrate bold behavior, because it will lead him to death or very serious problems, then what courage can be expected from him? Try for example, to show bold behavior in a situation where all dissent are put to the wall and shot, what will you achieve? Heroic death? And who needs it? After all, the main task of man in this world is to survive, and not die with his head held high.
Therefore, it all depends on how a person’s life evolved, how other people treated him, especially close ones, what he was allowed to do and what he was limited to, whether he experienced violence on himself or not and so on. Life does not necessarily break cowardly people; it can teach them how to live in certain conditions, when your possibilities are limited, when you cannot fight these or those forces. There he conceded, then he conceded, ran away from this, didn’t get involved with it, he gave up his interests here, so as not to aggravate the situation – this is the behavior of a coward. He is not a fighter by nature, because the skills of a fighter are not developed in him, his character is not seasoned, and he does not possess the necessary fighting qualities. More precisely, he possesses the qualities of a fighter, but they are crushed in him. So a person lives as he knows how, how he’s used to live, preferring flight to fight, and durability concessions. By nature, he is not a coward, his life simply evolved so that courage, courage, aggressiveness, he simply will not pull, either physically or mentally. In fact, all healthy people, in certain situations, can show cowardice. No one, being in their right mind, can be always and everywhere strong and courageous, this is impossible. Sometimes it’s necessary and even necessary to frighten in order to avoid some, extremely negative consequences or to get something, to succeed in something. For example, wanting to move up the career ladder, in service, a person needs to be able to adapt to a superior, rather than conflict with him. in certain situations can show cowardice. No one, being in their right mind, can be always and everywhere strong and courageous, this is impossible. Sometimes it’s necessary and even necessary to frighten in order to avoid some, extremely negative consequences or to get something, to succeed in something. For example, wanting to move up the career ladder, in service, a person needs to be able to adapt to a superior, rather than conflict with him. in certain situations can show cowardice. No one, being in their right mind, can be always and everywhere strong and courageous, this is impossible. Sometimes it’s necessary and even necessary to frighten in order to avoid some, extremely negative consequences or to get something, to succeed in something. For example, wanting to move up the career ladder, in service, a person needs to be able to adapt to a superior, rather than conflict with him.
So basically the aggression and cruelty of people make a person cowardly. Less commonly, illness affects it when a person feels his physical and spiritual weakness and therefore prefers not to climb on the rampage and not to jump above his head, realizing that it will cost him dearly. Suggestions can also make a coward out of a person – this is a kind of brainwashing, when, for example, you can frighten a person with some horror stories, say, of a religious nature and thus make him afraid of punishment for one or another of his actions. So a person can become cowardly, not encountering real violence against himself, but only imagining him to himself.
To help a person take another path – the path of a bold, strong, self-confident person – you need to gradually accustom him to this new model of behavior for him, showing him its practicality, effectiveness, efficiency, and most importantly, accessibility for him so that people He believed that he could draw a bolder life. But first, if a person lives with fears that suppress him, he must be rid of them. To do this, it is necessary to decompose in chronological order all the stages of the formation of his personality in order to see when and how his current, cowardly behavior model was consolidated and to understand the answer to what external factors it became. A lot of people may need to rethink in order not to be afraid of what they are used to be afraid of; to something, they will need to change their attitude so as not to worry and not be nervous, but for something,
For example, a cowardly person can avoid making bold decisions in situations that in fact do not threaten him, and therefore the courage and determination shown in them is a nut that is too tough for him at this particular moment. But he does not understand this, therefore, prefers to adhere to habitual behavior, that is, cowardly, timid and in a particular case absolutely pointless, because he is a chronic coward who sees danger even in his own shadow. In order to understand what opportunities he has, what determination he can show and through bold actions to go beyond the usual behavior, a person needs someone from outside, who will push him to decisive actions, who, if necessary, will make him be bold at the right time. And when he, thanks to this outside help, completes the necessary actions and sees that nothing bad happened, but on the contrary, everything turned out very well for him – he won, achieved success, due to the courage shown, this will be his first step on a new path – the path of a brave man. Having taken several such steps, which are necessarily successful, he will fix a new model of behavior in his mind and then he will be able to develop it, showing courage in those cases when it is appropriate, when it is in his power.
There is another important point in this matter. Some people may be afraid of what they are constantly doing, only under duress, when someone forces them to step over their fear and commit a bold, courageous act. That is, they are brave only when there is another person next to them, usually a strong, brave, confident, intelligent person who supports and directs them, or simply makes them do something. As a result, they are not bold on their own, but thanks to someone. It is also necessary to get rid of such dependence, otherwise cowardice cannot be completely overcome. Therefore, it is necessary to ensure that a person is courageous on his own initiative, confronting him with a choice: show courage or be terrified in a certain situation. Of course, these specific situations should be such so that a person has the strength to act in them boldly and independently, without needing outside help and support. Then he will become more independent in this matter.
Such a choice, it should be noted, life is constantly confronting each of us. Only here are situations in which he spontaneously arises that do not always allow us to make bold decisions and perform strong actions in order to consolidate the corresponding model of behavior. That is why some people get such a life experience that allows them to be courageous, courageous, proactive and self-confident, while others are forced to become cowards and act from the perspective of a weak person. Try, friends, to show courage more often, determining for this situation in which it is appropriate and necessary. She is more useful than cowardice. Brave people in this life do more than cowardly people. But don’t forget that being a coward is also beneficial when the fear that forces you to give in and back down signals a really serious danger,
