Thinking “win-win”: goodness or true leadership?

In a hypercompetitive world , Think win-win – thinks vinco vinci – which Stephen R. Covey identifies as 7 habits of truly effective people might at first glance seem to actually be the claim of losers, “good guys”, deluded .

After all, how many successful people seem to embody this habit? Is it not true that it is easier to find people in power positions within organizations that are the living representation of a win – lose approach? Arrogant and unable to take into consideration the interests of others, or selfish, unreliable, unable to develop relationships outside of those with those who incense them?

True leadership

Yet leadership is another thing. Nowadays companies do not need a relational muscle approach or absolute kings with courtiers in tow. More competition , more continuous need to innovate and renew, a progressive difficulty in attracting talents, a constant change of dynamics … In this context, surely the manager’s approach cannot be – as sometimes happens to feel in some organizations: “your I win is that you continue to work here with us ”. It is essential to create the conditions so that everyone in the company feels an element appreciated , of value , to turn on a process deliberated of contribution. The first step is therefore for the leader to build effective relationships .

And in this, “Thinking win – win” is essential. Because it is the only way to ensure that a relationship is effective , so functional , and durable – not “hit and run.”

Which human being is willingly in a relationship in which he always has the feeling of “losing” something, of not being taken into consideration, of not being valued, of being “used”? So the main road for those who want to work on the health and effectiveness of their relationships is to work on their “abundance mentality”, to put it with Covey. In this sense, Thinking wins is no longer just a negotiation key – the famous Prisoner Dilemma so loved in the training rooms a few years ago – but it has a profound relational impact .

Effective relationships

Here are some questions we can ask ourselves to verify our paradigm in relationships where we have difficulty in having a win – win approach :

  • What do I expect from this report?
  • What does the other expect?
  • Do I really want to work to work on a win win?
  • What are the strengths of the other?
  • What elements does the other value?
  • What can I give and offer?
  • What can I do different from tomorrow?

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