I know of many couples who choose to continue after there has been infidelity inside the picture.
There is a trend I have noticed in more than 90 out of 100 cases that I would like to describe.
The party who has been let down, i.e. the party whose partner has been unfaithful will, in the vast majority of cases, have a long period of jealousy and excessive control.
And I have met couples where such jealousy has lasted for several years, and even though the parties are still together, yes, cohabitation has not become much easier.
In the midst of the crisis, where a failed party has just discovered or been told that there has been a lover (mistress), many will try to repair their relationship. For they love the person who has failed, and the story can be long and pretty good on many levels. There is a lot to lose and one is getting ready to deal with this battle as well.
And all respect for that. Only the two people in the relationship can decide what is most right and least wrong to do.
However, one must realize that even though one promises and works to continue to have each other, in many cases there has begun to house a “ghost” in the relationship. A ghost that translates into questions and worries, unrest, jealousy and doubt if an agreement is not kept. If the partner does not come home as promised, and forgets to inform. If the partner comes with a bouquet of flowers after a few days of bad mood, well what does that mean then. And the party who has failed will, if the jealousy haunts, many times think that it is probably because he / she has a bad conscience.
If the partner seems distracted when you sit next to him / her on the sofa, it will mean that the lover is thought of.
If the unfaithful party fails to show support and interest in a situation where one is vulnerable, many will feel that it is probably because there are still feelings for the other.
And so on and so on.
Many say, even after a year of fidelity and kept promises, that there may still be glimpses where you are not sure if you can trust your partner.
This is not written to scare anyone.
It is written to tell about the reality that many have when infidelity has come to light.
And it is written to emphasize that everything has a price.
And because I want to ask people to reflect on what kind of love they have.
- For I will ask people to clarify with themselves whether they associate love with coziness.
- I want to ask people to clarify whether love and security are the same.
- I want to ask people to clarify how they think they can respect each other after infidelity.
- And I want to ask people to clarify whether love should be at the expense of values like honesty, loyalty and joy.
If you really want to investigate and know more about what love is, well then I would recommend people to move a little from their pocket philosophical considerations and immerse themselves in the author Paolo Coelho’s authorship.
He has written five books that have been translated into Danish. And Paolo Coelhos is the master of both simplicity and complexity.
Then read “The Alchemist”, read “11 minutes”, read “Sahir”, read “Veronica decides to die”, and read “The Fifth Mountain”, because then you will know more about what love is and what love is not.
