For a long time, being single (especially after 30) was seen as a bad thing for a woman’s life.
The man could relate without committing himself to anyone, who would still have his image as a “conqueror” unfinished.
While the woman was seen as problematic, with serious handcuffs, and desperate to find a partner. Today, although she may still suffer from malicious comments, the single woman is usually very well with her civil status.
Yes, it is sometimes normal to feel lacking. But that doesn’t mean that being single is a bad thing.
On the contrary: until 2017, the number of singles was 78 million in Brazil alone. After all, people are increasingly aware that between a bad partner and their freedom, the second option is much more worthwhile.
Okay, you know that freedom is very good, but the family keeps picking on you and the need is strong.
Even as you build your career, pay your bills and live an active life, you still hear those nasty comments about your love life – often from even your friends. Is being single really good? Yes it’s great!
In this post, you will understand:
- Why do women get so charged with their love and sex life;
- If having a marriage after 30 is bad;
- What are the main advantages of being single.
Why do women get so charged in their love lives?
We live in a sexist society that, although it has been much worse, still needs to go a long way. While men are celebrated when they go out with many women (the famous “catchers”), women are criticized (the “chickens”).
It can seem comforting to have a relationship and to stop this kind of issue. Ledo mistake.
As soon as you start dating, the charges don’t decrease, they just change. Instead of asking about a boyfriend, they now want to know when the wedding will take place and then the children.
But is marriage really good for women?
Research has shown that men are much more benefited by marriage than women. To give you an idea, the same study reveals that married people suffer less from health problems than singles. But what kind of conclusion can we draw from this information? That, unfortunately, men still see women as their mothers or nannies .
But know that there is no magic formula for relationships. You can get married early and have a happy life with your partner, or leave it for later, and still have an unhappy union. Only coexistence can reveal whether the decision was correct. So, before you get married, date a lot, get along closely with your partner and see if you complement each other in other factors besides sex.
Can getting older be bad?
No, but, as in any relationship, there is no certainty that it will be good. The big advantage is that a more mature woman is more likely to marry out of will, rather than impulse.
In addition, the likelihood that you will be successful in your career is greater when you are older. This means that she is unlikely to be financially dependent on a husband – and if so, she will not be stuck in a relationship for that.
According to a study by the Institute for Family Studies, those who marry at 25 are 50% less likely to split up than those who marry at 20.
However, after 30, the chances of separation increase by 5% each year. This means that those who get married at 34 have a 5% more chance of separating than those who get married at 33. However, the reasons for this increase are not clear.
The suspicion is that those who get older are used to single life and have more difficulties adapting to living together. That is, for this person, it is more worthwhile to be single.
What are the main advantages of being single?
See why you should enjoy your bachelorhood!
Ask a married friend what she misses most from her maiden season.
She will probably answer about doing things your way, without having to try to come to terms with the other with the partner. The freedom to be single is that if you live alone and pay your own bills, you can make the decisions that you feel are most correct.
From going to the new restaurant to starting a new job in Europe. All decisions only imply a change in your life. Besides, just the fact that you don’t have to give anyone any satisfaction about every step you take is a big advantage of being single, isn’t it?
According to Paul Dolan, professor of behavioral sciences at the London School of Economics, single women are happier . For the teacher, they are the ones who lose the most when they decide to say yes to marriage. While men should be concerned with finding a partner, for them this should not be a factor to consider.
Professor Elyakim Kislev, from Hebrew University in Israel, not only agrees with Dolan, but also states that singles tend to have a much better academic background than married couples.
When you’re in a relationship, it’s quite normal for you to share your friends – almost to the point that you both meet the same people, with no one new to introduce to the other. But, at the time of separation , these groups end up dividing, at least for a while.
Thus, being single allows you to meet new people more easily, because there is no need to agree on which places to go – from the crochet club to pole dance classes, for example. Having time, money and disposition, the only expenses affected will be yours.
In fact, another detail is that couples usually visit the same places and, consequently, end up seeing the same people.
When you are single, you are the one who determines whether to continue the routine or look for something new. In addition, there are cases of people who abandon their friendships because of a partner.
In that case, there are likely to be two problems: excessive emotional dependence on the partner (you think your life revolves around him) or an abusive relationship (he controls all your steps and requires you to stop talking to friends). In both cases, seek help.
According to economist Samy Dana , singles spend more on parties, drinks, food, leisure and culture, studies and travel, while committed people have more expenses on gifts, dinners and cultural programs for both.
In addition, being married can mean the division of accounts, but also double the expenses. As for single, all expenses are your responsibility – but you spend your money as you see fit.
Finally, if your money is tight, you won’t have to spend on gifts on holidays.
Do you like having your moment and a space just for you? Being single allows this and more!
There is no need to share a bed every day or leave the house to have an hour just for you. Also, no need to worry about the toilet lid open, the wet towel on the bed.
But are you the one who does all this? Beauty. The house is yours, and you can do whatever you want!
You can be single and not be alone – that is up to you.
Being single, in fact, allows you to meet different men and have a more accurate perception, both affective and sexually. After all, knowing different people, it is possible to have more luggage to know which type of kiss, sexual practices and even personality characteristics are more compatible with you.
This does not mean, too, that you should go out and get everyone if you don’t want to. But if you want, don’t forget the condom, huh?
Being single allows you more freedom to plan what you want to do with your life, especially with regard to your career .
In a relationship, the other person is always a factor to be considered when the job requires significant changes to your routine – change of state, for example. Of course, a boyfriend shouldn’t be a deterrent to following your dreams.
But if a woman wants to pursue an international master’s degree and her partner has a steady job, the chances of him wanting to give up his career to go with you are less. As a result, she may feel discouraged and even insecure. Again, I say to you: the partner must not hinder anything in your life.
On the contrary, nothing better than being surrounded by people who support you. In addition, many couples manage to overcome the distance.
However, for those who are single, making this type of decision is much easier. After all, the only life affected (when you are financially and emotionally independent) is yours.
Okay, that advantage is quite relative. There are those who enjoy attending family programs.
But if you are more shy, reserved or can no longer answer “and when will the wedding be?” Or “and the children?”, Not having to visit a partner’s great aunt or third cousin can be a big advantage.
See how great being single is when you know how to enjoy the stage? So don’t pay anybody’s opinion. If you want to be alone, stay; if you want a relationship with someone who likes you, enter without fear. The important thing is to know how to enjoy your own company and not throw your happiness on someone else’s back.
Thus, your relationships will be much healthier because they will happen out of desire for both, not out of fear of loneliness . Ready to be happy without needing a partner?