Helicopter parents: who they are and why they are harmful to their children

This definition, parents who are very, too close to their children, who help them overcome any difficulty, especially in the school environment. Just like helicopters they are literally above the children,they try to satisfy their needs.

What are the signs of a helicopter parent?

They replace the child and do everything to make life easier, but what are the signs of a helicopter parent in particular ? And what can be done?

1. They fight their son’s battles. The solution is not to solve children’s problems but to support them, helping to manage emotions.
2. They do their homework. The solution is to leave small challenges to him, rewarding him when he can.
3. They coach the coaches. The solution is to explain to your child how to relate to the coach, not do it yourself.
4. They keep their son on a leash. The solution is to be able to be more independent.
5. They act as a personal waitress. The solution is to start entrusting simple tasks.
6. They don’t do anything for fear of getting hurt. The solution is to also give him the opportunity to peel a knee. The goal is to keep it safe but not as safe as possible.
7. They don’t make him wrong. The solution is to allow him to make mistakes and encourage him to get up.

You learn by mistake: the study

The psychologists of the University of Minnesota also confirmed this, according to which it is natural and beautiful that parents do everything possible to offer their children the best guaranteeing health and safety, but children need the right space to learn how to grow alone, without mom or dad “flying” over them.

The study, published in the journal Developmental Psychology , found that excessive parental control can adversely affect a child’s ability to manage their emotions and behaviors.

“Our research has shown that children with helicopter parents may be less able to handle the tough demands of growth, especially in the school complex environment”, said Nicole B. Perry, PhD, of the University of Minnesota, lead author study.

How not to become a helicopter parent?

The tips for not becoming a helicopter parent are German writers Lena Greiner and Carola Padtberg, who have published the book Helicopter Parents. How we are ruining the lives of our children (Feltrinelli Editore in Italy), with the aim of shedding light on the excesses of being a parent.

1. Trust your children. If they want to do things on their own, let them do it.
2. Do not try to prevent children from feeling negative feelings, such as disappointments, sadness, loneliness, failure.
3. Don’t treat your kids with gloves. Don’t try to be their best friends. Everyone needs to experience various feelings during childhood and adolescence, it is essential to learn how to deal with them.
4. Relax. Remember that if your child goes on a school trip for three nights, he will not die of food or sleep deprivation. He will have a good time with his classmates, as long as the parents don’t intervene.