There are people for whom it is very easy to make friends – communication for them is not a big deal or problem, they are nice to everyone and are ready to support any conversation. It is much easier for such extroverts to socialize – from a very early age, from kindergarten, to the present time in adulthood. Others will prefer to quietly stand aside from the noisy company, sit at home and work with equipment, and not with people. And introverts should not be blamed for this in savagery and inadequacy for modern life in society. Well, they don’t like it. Nevertheless , everyone needs friends , regardless of communication skills and love of loneliness / society. But it is worth remembering that friendship does not develop and does not last by itself. She, like a fragile flower, needs to be cherished and constantly fedinterest and communication – of course, if you want your friend to be there in any situation. And vice versa – if you just never be interested in what is happening with a friend in life, then there will be no friendship, you can believe me.
If you don’t maintain a relationship, your friend can soon turn into an ex, a person with whom you once had a lot in common, but now you just remember how you used to communicate. And you don’t want to lose friends, do you? Friends can not only entertain and brighten up leisure, but also support and help in a difficult situation, give advice in the professional field, and even contribute to employment. So maintaining friendship is essential, and I will tell you how you can do this with some effort on your part, but without much difficulty.
- I advise you to be as accessible as possible for friendsin communication and communication methods. Let them have your mobile phone number, email address. It is worth registering on social networks: the choice is yours, it will be Facebook, Odnoklassniki or Vkontakte. If a friend also uses Twitter, it makes sense to register on that network as well. With the help of online social channels, you can keep abreast of what your friends are doing, what they write in their statuses, what new photos are being published, and what is generally happening in their lives.
- On the other hand, it is important that you can also be easily contacted. Check your mail, go to social networks, reply to your friends’ messages – so that they feel that you are near, and not just exist somewhere abstractly – on the same planet, but simply in parallel with them, without intersecting in any way.
- Keeping in touch with friends is not enough. If you already write to them regularly, then still be careful what they answer you. It is impossible for communication to be one-sided, so that you only talk about your news, and your friend only listened, and vice versa. Be sure to look through previous messages if you do not remember what a friend wrote to you, and react to his news. After all, if he writes to you, and you only tell you in response what is happening in your life, who will want to write to you about their affairs again – after all, it is important for you to hear only yourself! This is very offensive and discourages any desire to keep in touch. This rule, by the way, applies not only when communicating online, but also in real life. People, especially close ones, need to be seriously interested, and not pretend.
- If you have not contacted a friend for a long time – it’s time to write or call and ask how and what is happening in his life. Even if the last letter or call was yours. It is also important to see your friends at least once every couple of weeks, to call up so as not to lose that thread that connects you in the real world. Plus, having fun with an old friend or a group of buddies is a great way to relax and escape from your day-to-day worries.
- Surely you have a very busy schedule, and you can hardly find time for a normal rest, let alone meeting with friends. But this is precisely what is needed, as it has already become clear. So grab your day planner and enter meetings with friends in it, as you write down business lunches, meetings and meetings with partners. If you work with some of your friends in the same area, go out for lunch on weekdays together. Invite an old team of buddies over to your place for dinner or go out together. Once or twice a month you can find a free evening for this. But as a result, you will not lose anything, because you will get a great time and keep in touch with people who are important to you.
- Help is a very important element of friendship. Of course, it’s not like that when one friend hangs up a lot of his affairs on you, believes that you have no right to refuse, and you cannot find support from the very day with fire. (Do not let yourself sit on your head; and a real good friend will never do that.) Sometimes it is worth helping with deeds, completing an important and necessary task. But often all that is required is to listen and not interrupt a friend with your comments, and even more so with thoughts and statements that can upset, and not support in any way, at a difficult moment.
- It is also necessary to ask for help, do not be shy. But it is also impossible to be offended and stop communicating if a friend cannot help. He may have different circumstances, a lot of workload and his own problems. And if you decide to ask for help, I do not advise you to send a bulk message asking everyone you know and wait for someone to respond. If you know that someone can really help – contact him personally and talk directly – including what you will understand if he is unable to help you.
- Friends can have important moments in life, such as wedding, childbirth, promotion, buying a home – everyone has their own joy. With them you need to be able to rejoice. After all, many can help in a difficult situation and support in trouble. But really being happy for your friendmay not be so easy. In honor of the joyous occasion, invite a friend to a restaurant or invite over to your place and cook his favorite dish. Let the person feel that you are truly sharing their joy.
- Alot and often is said about being able to listen, but I am convinced by my own example that for many words either simply fly past their ears (or do not linger in consciousness), or such people simply do not care about what is happening to you … But somehow they don’t want to hear what you are saying. It is much more interesting for them to quickly switch the conversation to themselves. Do you know those? Well, I advise you to communicate less with such “friends”, there is little return from this friendship. But it’s worth watching yourself – try to remember what your friends tell you, what worries them in life.
- There are times when buddies stop answering messages and calls, as if they are simply ignoring. If you have not offended such a person in any way, it is quite possible that he has a serious problem in which he needs support. Try to find out what happened, and offer help, express your willingness to lend a shoulder. It can save the relationship, it will surely save the person in a difficult period, and possibly refresh old friendships.
- It is very important to understand that friendship may not last forever– from kindergarten to retirement. People live their own lives, move away from each other, lose common interests. This is all normal – life puts everything in its place. If the points of contact are preserved, such friendship can really last for many years. Then I will only be happy for you, it is a great success when there are a couple of such close friends in life since childhood – who know you in a way that many new acquaintances do not know. But if the friendship nevertheless came to naught, it is worth looking back and analyzing what happened, and then, building new friendships, not to repeat your previous mistakes.
It doesn’t matter if you are an introvert or an extrovert, friendships and relationships with other people and the world around you require investing attention, personal time and mental strength in them. It is imperative to devote part of yourself to this, otherwise you risk being left without friends, support and good, sincere communication.