He seems to be the man of your dreams. Beautiful, polite, attentive, knows all your tastes and makes you feel like a queen. However, underneath all this perfection, there is someone who is manipulative, lying, narcissistic and, in some cases, even cruel. We are talking about the famous scoundrel, someone who can take you from heaven to hell in a short time, leaving only pieces of a relationship. The worst thing is that they lie so well that they can deceive a good number of women without them realizing it. How to avoid this type of man? It is a difficult task, but today I am going to show you some signs of how to find out if he is a scoundrel.
In today’s text we will cover the following topics:
- What is a scoundrel man?
- He manages to turn the tide
- Why are they so irresistible?
- They have qualities
- Profile changed
- They are masters in the game of conquest
- Signs to recognize a scoundrel
- How to relate to a scoundrel?
- How to avoid a scoundrel
- What to do?
What is a scoundrel man?
According to Houaiss, one of the meanings of the word cafajeste is: individual without nobility of feelings, with malformation of character, in whom one cannot trust; scoundrel, rascal.
The boorish man is always very flattering, very polite and has surprising speech. Although at first you don’t trust what he says, it is usually so convincing that you end up believing, after all he is constantly feeding your ego; then you will want him close to you.
Perhaps you have even met a man like this: he looked too good to be true, he looked so perfect that the warning lights flashed in his head. However, he showed so much confidence, so much sincerity, that you put your defenses aside. And it went wrong.
He manages to turn the tide
The scoundrel is generally very friendly and attractive, a behavior typical of men who tend to deceive. However, his flattering jokes can become nasty comments in the blink of an eye if he doesn’t get exactly what he wants. If you accuse him of lying, don’t be surprised if he reverses roles, trying to make you think that YOU are the one with the problem. Or else, he will try to convince you that everything is just a figment of your imagination … From accused to accusing.
Why are they so irresistible?
Have you ever heard that most women prefer bad guys? This statement has some truth. Nice men, good people, dedicated, don’t usually have that much appeal, at least at first sight. The cafajeste man has a kind of trickster, a naughty way, that ends up seducing women right away. They promise adventure, burning passions and a little danger; and end up seducing women who are tired of their routines.
The fact is that the scoundrel is a good seducer and if his self-esteem is low, it will be easy prey for him. It satisfies every woman’s desire to have a man who makes her feel unique and irreplaceable and they believe they are the love of their lives. Although some of them notice the contradictory attitudes of the crooks, they realize that with them it will be different, that love will change them. Pure illusion. The real scoundrel cannot be transformed because he needs to crush the other in order to exist.
They have qualities
The boorish man has his qualities that are indisputable. They are usually more fun men, who know how to fulfill a woman’s wishes in bed, without any modesty or judgment. It seems like a dream doesn’t it? However, all of this comes with a price. Women who get involved with this guy have to keep in mind that they may get hurt, with their self-esteem shaken. Are good times and good sex (and good orgasms) worth wounds that can last a lifetime?
The first thing we need to keep in mind is that today’s hooligan is not the same as your mother or grandmother’s days. Forget the image of the rude, sexist and rude guy. It is not the guy who arrives rubbing his ass or wanting to hit, but the one who wants to reach the heart of others.
Today’s hustler is that guy who doesn’t get involved easily, who manages to attract women. He knows how to keep cool when needed and be cute when needed. He is driven by conquest, a seducer who knows how to be manipulative and feeds a woman’s dreams, hopes and fantasies to have her. Once you succeed, you lose interest.
They are masters in the game of conquest
In the beginning, when they meet a woman that interests them, they invest to create bonds and do not measure phone calls or e-mails. Over time this attention will decrease until the situation is reversed and the woman is calling, running after and inviting to go out. They run away from commitment, so they usually disappear when the woman is in love because there are no challenges.
Signs to recognize a scoundrel
1. Never has time
The boor spends little time with you and the times when you are by your side are bad. It is fickle, appears at inappropriate times, imposes the rhythm you want and when you want it, leaves you hostage to sudden appearances. You never know when he might be with you. If you are at your side it never focuses on you: you answer the phone for everyone, touch your cell phone, combine a thousand ballads, tours and trips that you are rarely included in.
2. Does not appear on important dates
Do you know those super important moments for your family? Your grandmother’s birthday, cousin’s wedding, Christmas at your mother’s house. If you date a scoundrel, get used to justifying his absence. The boor will rarely be seen on these holidays. Anything that looks like ‘coming into your life’ is a sign of danger, it gets out.
3. Loves to play the victim
Does that person know that when we discover something about her, she immediately tries to make you think that she is not one of those? Well, the scoundrel always plays the innocent and blames other people. Worse: it’s the type that makes you feel sorry. It affects the emotional of any woman, so she can manipulate and reverse any situation.
4. Always lie
He’s a card liar. You always end up discovering little lies, but the truth is that everything about him is a lie. The boor has several personalities and shows the one that most satisfies you. You begin to notice that there is a difference in personality with other people and alone with you. This is a maximum warning sign because it shows that he is representing.
5. Shows signs of infidelity
He swears he will never betray you, but you keep getting messages or mysterious calls from women. However, it is never his fault, of course. They are just crazy women who insist on pursuing him. The man when he is a scoundrel never gets to be with just one woman, because he is greedy and needs to feel desired; and wants to be in control of everything.
Get fights at strategic times
Carnival, New Year’s Eve, holidays and suddenly a fight arises between you without a head or a head. Of those that you don’t know how or why you started and when you will realize, both are shouting and you just can’t end the discussion. Well, he got what he wanted: the endorsement to travel single with friends. And in case you discover a slip on that trip, he will claim that the two were separated.
7. He has several friends who are almost sisters
Okay, we know that men have a lot of friends, but the number of hooligans’ friends is insane and they are all very close to him. Certainly, of all, they have the ones that are true, but most of them have a strange behavior. These friends go out alone with him, go to his house, take several rides with him … and you are never with them.
8. It doesn’t let you look at any social network
The boorish man has a lot to hide, so he’ll panic if you take a look at Facebook, WhatsApp or his email. Answering the phone or reading a message? No way! If you ever try to do that, he’ll go crazy, talking about invasion of privacy or lack of trust. Let’s be clear here: I am not telling you to steal his password or anything, but it is to suspect that he is always receiving messages when they are together and never tells you who the author is. If he gets really upset about it, that’s a reason to be suspicious.
9. Just want sex
After he conquers you, he doesn’t answer your calls, doesn’t answer on WhatsApp and only shows up on Saturday night. After getting what he wants, the scoundrel is not interested in what you feel, does not want to share good times with you, does not want to take you to good restaurants. The only thing that matters is sex. As he no longer needs to try, he will only look for you to vent. The situation will only change if he realizes that you are getting out. Then he goes back to being the charming man at the beginning of the relationship (if we can call that a relationship).
10. He won’t take you, but he won’t let you go
The boorish man says he doesn’t want a serious commitment, but he also doesn’t let you get on with your life. Hit your friends at parties, but then send you well-crafted texts, with all the words that every woman dreams of hearing; everything done to make you think: “Ah, he really likes me!”.
If he sees you happy, with another face, enjoying life, he’ll go after it. Because he likes to have you around, but most of all, he likes to know that you like him. This is necessary to feed the scoundrel’s ego.
How to relate to a scoundrel?
If your intention is just to have fun, without compromise and expectations, the scoundrel does not present risks to the heart. Now, if you want something more serious, it gets more complicated. It will not change, however much you try to transform it. It does not recycle, it does not evolve. It is up to you to assess whether it is worth it to be with someone who has limitations in the relationship.
How to avoid a scoundrel
Now that you know the signs to recognize a scoundrel, it’s time to look at yourself. What to do to not attract men like that? See if you don’t look for this type of man without realizing it. There are women who unconsciously take pleasure in caring, in being submissive. Likewise, there are many men out there looking for this type of “victim”.
Take care of what you post on social media. Remember that hooligans wear a mask to become what women want most. Evaluate what you write, the photos you post. In relationship apps, care must be doubled. Without meaning to, we can be a gimmick for the crooks and attract people who are the opposite of what we are looking for. Don’t get carried away by a pretty face or empty compliments.
What to do?
Choosing the right guy takes work and demands time, dedication and love. It is not always an easy task, but when you recognize bad guys, you will not waste your precious time with a relationship that will go nowhere. Choose men who deserve your time and your love and who will put your relationship above all else. Don’t waste your time and your tears on a scoundrel who doesn’t care what you feel and can’t see the amazing woman you are. You certainly deserve much more than that