Social phobia means fear of other people, fear of any interaction with them, i.e. it is fear in certain social situations in the performance of any social action.
For example, a person works in an office and feels constrained when talking to colleagues. Or a young man who is afraid to approach a girl. These two cases share the same fear – social phobia.
It would seem that this is critical? Nearly everyone experiences periodic fear of interacting with a particular person in a particular situation.
Yes it is. But the way this fear proceeds can have a detrimental effect, both on the physical state of a person, and on the mental, or it can even “undermine” the current social status of a person in the position of work, family, friends.
How does social phobia manifest?
The symptoms of social phobia can be very different, but most often they appear:
- severe awkwardness, when the body “seems to be chained”;
- heartbeat increases, which can sometimes reach dizziness;
- profuse sweating of the arms, legs and armpits;
- catches breath to such an extent that a person cannot say a word.
People suffering from social phobia become “reclusive” of this fear, which makes them avoid public places, interacting with people, attending social events, etc.
Social phobia people stop communicating normally and building their lives. Every time, passing by people and hearing their laughter, social phobia is thrown into a shiver, and the question is spinning in my head: “Are they laughing at me?” At each possible interaction with people, they begin to think about their actions and words in advance, and later, reviewing the situation, thoughts arise: “How should I have answered him correctly?”
If in this article you recognized yourself, well, you have fallen into the trap of social phobia! And in order for this trap not to slam shut completely and irrevocably, it is necessary to identify the reasons for the formation of social phobia, and then determine the ways to overcome it. Only a certified specialist will help you with this in getting rid of fears and phobias.
What is the reason for the formation of social phobia?
The reason for the formation of social anxiety lies in childhood. The situations that triggered the development of this phobia could be in school or kindergarten.
For example, if the child was an outcast, or peers or adults occasionally laughed at him. And it even happens that the teacher will put him at the blackboard in front of the whole class and allow him to laugh at him for a minor offense.
Such situations leave a deep mark on the psyche of the child. And subsequently, he will unconsciously avoid situations that can provoke disapproval and ridicule from others, thereby depriving himself of the chances for a successful and happy life.
How to overcome social phobia?
In my professional activity I come across this kind of “social phobia” quite often. Ways to overcome social phobia depend on the degree of “neglect” of this phobia, on the person himself and his motivation.
Here are some ways to overcome social phobia:
- Creating positive attitudes
This method involves replacing negative attitudes about yourself with positive attitudes. For example: “I am afraid to talk to strangers”, replace it with “I talk confidently with strangers.”
- Relaxation
Try to meditate periodically. It is a great remedy for relieving stress and negative thoughts.
Now on the Internet there are a lot of meditation techniques, audiotrans, where step by step instructions are given for their implementation.
- “If you are afraid of something – do it first!”
With this method, it is simply imperative to constantly leave your comfort zone and train to do what you are afraid of. For example: singing on the street, meeting girls, etc.
If you can’t do it right away, then try first to “play” these situations in your head.
- Accept yourself! Love yourself!
The main thing in this way of overcoming social phobia is to learn to accept yourself and others. Indeed, sometimes, we ascribe our negative traits to others, thus the protective mechanism – projections – works.
Start playing sports, give up bad habits, find a hobby to your liking, walk and travel more, and then, positive emotions will begin to form, both to yourself and to those around you.
- Working with a specialist
Now, there are many psychological techniques and trainings that smooth out the symptoms of social anxiety, but what they most often have in common is the temporary effect.
Working with a specialist is the most effective method, and is simply necessary when other methods have not helped. At the same time, the specialist helps to remove the root cause of this fear, after which the phobia completely disappears. There is no reason – there is no provoking factor, due to which attacks of phobia begin.
Manifestation of social phobia in life
Unfortunately, most people live with this fear and don’t know how to get rid of it. And getting rid of it is necessary and important.
Consider the life of some of the social phobia.
A young guy who still cannot find a life companion. It would seem that nothing prevents him from building a relationship, but every time he refuses to meet girls and looks for excuses like “She’s not so beautiful”, or “She won’t talk to me”, or “I’m not in the mood to get to know each other right now , I’ll come up another time ”and so on, after which, by such avoidance, he remains alone.
Or a woman who deserves a promotion at work avoids a new position because of the mere thought of leading a department or an entire company. Because of this, she begins to unconsciously “mow”, thereby running away from her success.
Sometimes a person feels anxiety, which often bothers him, but he does not realize that this is fear associated with the assessment of his actions by others. A person does not expand his comfort zone by doing something worthwhile, but listens to his surroundings and lives in a world comfortable for others.
Both the guy and the woman, the whole situation may be to blame from childhood, which provoked the development of social phobia. Childhood fear prevents you from growing up!
Ask yourself: “Do you want to continue this life?”, “Is it worth avoiding everything or is it time to change something?”
My clients, after working out, say that the first thing they needed to do before going into adulthood was to work out, because so many chances can be lost due to children’s thinking patterns.
And remember, it is never too late to start the struggle for a happy life, without psychological inhibitions and fears
