1. Sleep in separate beds
Couples who sleep apart are often stigmatized and even labeled as overnight divorces. It is considered a sign that the relationship is either failing or lacking sex.
These scenarios may indeed be true. But these are far from all the reasons why people decide to sleep separately. Perhaps one partner snores loudly all night, twitches in their sleep , falls asleep much later or wakes up much earlier, while the other is a light sleeper. In such cases, sleeping in separate beds or rooms is a necessity. Research shows that sleep quality suffers when partners sleep together.
Sleeping separately, on the contrary, helps you get enough sleep and avoid conflicts. If both partners are happy with this arrangement, it only makes the relationship healthier. And to stay connected, you can come up with an evening ritual, such as hugging or chatting for at least a few minutes before going to different beds or bedrooms.
2. Talk about past relationships
Some people find the topic too uncomfortable or worry that their current partner might view talking about their ex as a threat. But everyone has a past, and it’s what shapes us into who we are today.
When we give in to our insecurities, fears, or jealousy, we miss important information about our partner’s past and don’t get a sense of their personality development—their behavior during conflicts, triggers, and character. In addition, the way someone talks about their previous relationships helps us understand what kind of person they are. If they don’t take responsibility for past mistakes, they haven’t changed and the situation may repeat itself.
3. Flirt with other people
Flirtatious advances toward someone other than your partner are often considered a sign of infidelity or dissatisfaction with the relationship. However, if there is no intention to cheat, light flirting, according to psychologists, is even beneficial.
When we flirt, we rediscover our sensuality and gain confidence. And we can bring these positive experiences into our current relationships. It is just important to make sure that the flirting does not cross the line of what is acceptable from the partner’s point of view.
4. Masturbate
Many people mistakenly believe that if a person indulges in self-gratification, it means that he or she does not enjoy sex in a relationship . In fact, sex with a partner and masturbation satisfy different needs. They do not replace each other and work perfectly in tandem.
The most important sexual relationship is with yourself. Connecting with your own pleasure is necessary to better understand your own preferences and clearly communicate them to your partner. In this way, masturbation promotes greater closeness and intimacy in relationships.
5. Watch porn
This habit can be harmful if porn is watched too often, used to cope with negative emotions, or if it begins to interfere with relationships or work. But in many cases, porn can be a great addition to a healthy and exciting sex life with a partner. According to research , couples who watch porn together report enjoying sex more and connecting better with each other.
6. Rest separately
When partners plan trips alone or with their friends and family, it doesn’t mean they’re avoiding each other. They’re simply cultivating relationships with themselves and other important people in their lives.
Healthy relationships need both closeness and distance. Separate vacations provide an opportunity to gain autonomy, independence , and self-confidence. In addition, when traveling alone, partners begin to miss each other and appreciate the relationship in a new way.
7. Talk openly about money
Some partners have no idea who earns how much and where they spend their money. Sometimes this situation can be costly, for example, if one loses their job and becomes completely dependent on the other’s income.
Meanwhile, honest conversations about money can be a great way to get closer. Since financial difficulties are rarely just about money, discussing them helps each partner grow in other areas as well. Most often, we perceive money problems as a problem that needs to be solved. But they usually also indicate that it’s time to change something in your life in general.
8. Keep secrets from your partner
This is a controversial point, but in some cases, keeping things secret from each other can actually be useful. For example, if partners did something in the past that they no longer do and from which they learned lessons.
To determine whether it is worth sharing a secret, psychologists advise asking yourself why you want to reveal it: because you want to clear your conscience or because it will be better for the development of the relationship? In addition, you need to evaluate the consequences. If your partner does not like what was hidden from him, they can be destructive to the relationship.