In the digital age, emotional cheating is more common—you don’t have to meet someone in person to flirt over text and feel romantic interest in a mysterious stranger online. The following seven signs will help you realize that you may have crossed the line.
You are more interested in communication “on the side”
It is completely normal to draw inspiration from communication – it is unlikely that your partner can hold a conversation on a highly specialized topic better than your friendly colleague. The situation is under control if your relationship does not suffer from it. As soon as your attention and energy are given to someone to the detriment of your other half, you can talk about emotional betrayal. Do not forget about balance – while enjoying communication outside of marriage, it is important to make sure that you do not destroy the emotional connection with your spouse.
You enjoy secret connections
Although your feelings (including platonic ones) towards your crush may be sincere, do you get special pleasure from the “wickedness” and secrecy of your relationship? In this case, you yourself realize that something bad is happening to your relationship, but you cannot or simply do not intend to stop. Joy may be caused, among other things, by the opportunity to “take a break” from your partner.
You feel the need to hide the content or frequency of communication
Except in cases of unhealthy jealousy, there is no need to hide episodes of communication with other people from your partner. When you begin to realize that your partner should not know under any circumstances what you are talking about with a third party and how often you do this, this is also emotional cheating, unless we are talking about confidential communication for objective reasons.
You are afraid to admit to yourself that you have changed.
Even if your partner suspects something is wrong and directly asks you about changes in your behavior, you will deny everything or refer to fatigue. Refusing to discuss the status of your relationship with your partner can be a sign of a serious discord. Even if your emotional cheating is relatively harmless to your union, avoiding serious conversations can lead to a split in the couple, when you simply stop understanding each other.
You have romantic feelings for someone else.
Perhaps the most obvious sign of emotional cheating is a romantic relationship on the side. However, everything is individual: for some, even kissing is not considered betrayal. But if we are talking about emotional infidelity, frequent fantasies about one specific person are also considered, especially if the object of desire is aware of your indifference.
You are “sizing up” the backup option
Like it or not, we compare not only our partners to other people, but ourselves as well. Noticing that someone earns more than your chosen one is not the same as imagining your life with a cute neighbor in small details. In other words, if you are seriously considering the possibility of preparing a “backup airfield,” it may be time to admit that the current relationship is no longer viable.
The partner “loses” in priority
Another example of emotional cheating is when the needs of another person repeatedly turn out to be higher than the needs of your spouse. For example, you will not hesitate to refuse to accompany your man to an important family event just because you agreed to “write” with a new friend. If your empathy works, it is definitely not in favor of your permanent partner.