A passively aggressive person is PASSIVE on the surface and AGGRESSIVE below it. Such a person does not have the courage to express his aggression directly, and therefore vents it indirectly.
A passively aggressive person considers himself a VICTIM of circumstances. He sees the cause of all problems in his surroundings, while the real cause in most cases is himself. It does not go into discussion, it does not go into confrontation, it does not go into conflict. He lets others decide, and then complains when the decision is not in his favor.
What does a passively aggressive person say?
If a passively aggressive person has a problem with you, they will never tell you. On the contrary, it stops communicating and starts to avoid you. That is why a passively aggressive communication style is one of the most complicated. A passively aggressive person says:
“I’m not upset.” Although it’s obvious that he’s upset.
“Okay, I don’t care.” Although he obviously doesn’t care and he’s clearly against it.
“Sure, I’ll take care of it.” With the intention of never.
“Sure, I’ll do it.” With the intention of flinching.
“It’s a great job. I wouldn’t believe you did it. “ A false compliment to drop the other.
“It was just a joke.” A maneuver that allows you to express yourself sharply and then back away. Sarcasm is also typical because it is socially acceptable. Although it can strike and injure.
A passively aggressive person is often demonstratively silent enough to indicate that he has a problem. But he will never say what his problem is, and he will never solve it.
He mumbles to himself instead of speaking out loud. The problem is not being communicated with, so there is no hope that it will ever be resolved.
Wrecker war in the workplace
A passively aggressive person believes that he is helpless. That is why he never confronts people directly and wages indirect wrecking wars.
Guerrilla wars are common in the workplace, where we cannot openly express our aggression. Guerilla is a diminutive of the Spanish word guerra denoting war. A passively aggressive person avoids big decisive battles and focuses on small raids, the aim of which is to cause trouble to the enemy. For example, it will not supply you with the documents you need or it will deliver them to you late.
Passively aggressive people are externally cooperative, but in reality they are hidden saboteurs. They are happy when others fail.
Is it different?
Did you know your boss in this description? Your colleague? Or even yourself? There are also more effective communication styles. Come and get acquainted with them in the Effective Communication course , which was the third most popular course last year. With psychologist and psychotherapist Jana Wiesner, you will learn to detect manipulators in your environment and learn strategies for communicating in conflict situations. We hold your place in the course.