Negative thinking is a proven health risk. It also makes your life more boring. If you want to be happier, pay attention to what you think.
You don’t have to be overly positive or start repeating boring motivational phrases in your head. But think about what you’re thinking. Often we sabotage our own happiness with negative thoughts.
If you think about these things, you are poisoning your own mind unnecessarily:
“I’ll do it later”
Often, not doing things causes more stress than doing them. Undone things bother the mind and stress you out. Get things done and you can relax.
Catastrophic thinking
Just because something bad happens doesn’t mean more bad things will happen. But if you wait for something bad to happen, you’re ruining your mood by waiting for that disaster. Focus on the positive instead.
“I am not good enough”
Feelings of inadequacy plague many people. If it starts to bother you, think about what you are good at and why you are important. Remember that everyone is allowed to fail and no one is perfect.
“Taking care of yourself is selfish”
Always remember that in an emergency, even on an airplane, you should put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others. If you are exhausted, focus on yourself first. You need to take care of yourself.
“Other people’s lives are better than mine”
You never know the truth about other people’s lives. You can pretend to be anything on social media or in person. A happy marriage can be a sham, family life can be exhausting, friendships can be riddled with meanness, a dream home can have led to huge debts…whatever. Jealousy only hurts you. Focus on how you can live the life you want.
“I’m so happy…”
A new job, falling in love, losing weight, or getting rich can all add to your happiness. But if you believe that you can only be happy when you lose weight or find love, you’re robbing yourself of the chance to be happy now. Focus on what you already have, and take small steps toward your goal. Create a dating profile or change one meal a day to a healthier one.Photo by Dawid Zawila, top image Drop the Label Movement.
“I shouldn’t feel this way”
Are you basically fine, but still feeling depressed or anxious? It’s okay. Don’t judge your feelings, you can feel whatever you want. You can’t choose your feelings – otherwise we would all be happy all the time! What you can choose is your actions. What things and thoughts do you focus on? Do you seek help or not? Do you talk to others about your feelings or do you bottle them up?
“I wish I looked like him”
Comparing yourself is natural, but it won’t help you. It’s always good to eat healthily and exercise, but comparing your appearance to others and dwelling on it will only make you feel worse. Maybe you could decide to think positively about yourself?
“I should have”
The only benefit you get from thinking “should have” is that you may be able to act better in the future. Otherwise, complaining is completely pointless and only leads to self-blame and resentment. You can’t fix the past, but you can act differently in the future. Accept it and let it go.
“I am a complete fool”
Would you talk to a friend the way you talk to yourself? Yes. Make a conscious effort to replace a negative thought with a positive one whenever one pops into your mind. List three things you are really good at and three things you love about yourself, and remind yourself of these whenever you start to blame yourself.
“Let’s disappear”
Forget about the “let’s see what happens” mindset. Focus on doing your best and believing in yourself.
Perfectionism
Forget about striving for perfection. You learn by doing and from mistakes. If you believe that only things that lead to a perfect outcome are worth doing, you will end up doing nothing.
“I can’t”
Learn. The proverb “no one is born a blacksmith” is not a cliché, but absolutely true.