Passionate couples: when routine does havoc

Although many couples deny or say, “We’re fine,” intimacy is a fundamental part of a love relationship. As the years go by and the routine does its damage, many couples accuse it of being the trigger of the lack of passion. And with that comes boredom, boredom and wear.

The couple’s routine can end up decreasing the desire. It is a fact that, today, many couples are forced to work, children, daily responsibilities and forget to continue to cultivate that passion that once existed. But they say that where there were flames, ashes remain. Or not?

When passion fades

In the early stages of passion in any relationship, passion and sexual desire are protagonists. But afterwards, when everything “settles down” and love strengthens, that flame does not always stay alive, or at least we feel that there is something to be done, “something else” to revive what was previously naturally occurring.

Just because the passion ends, does not mean that there is no love. However, when a couple’s routine plays its part, you start to see the consequences in the reflection of what happens inside the room. And in many cases, this decrease in desire can lead to rupture.

Routine, the great culprit of modern times

According to a study by a team of scientists from Southampton Universities, College London University, London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine and the University of Glasgow, both men and women lose their sexual desire after a while coexistence.

Although, in some cases, this decrease in desire may be due to physical issues, experts warn that it may occur mainly due to lack of communication and emotional connection during intimate relationships.

Cynthia Graham, one of the authors of the investigation, said that the study exposes the “ importance of the context of the relationship in sexual desire in both men and women. Especially in women, the quality and duration of the relationship is very important ”.

So, if the solution is to have more communication between the couple and more emotional connection, the point is: how do we achieve this?

When there is love but not desire

Coexistence, stress, children, years and years always doing the same thing, the lack of changes, the need to work long hours, tiredness, among other things, are determining factors for the passion to fade .

Many couples are convinced that they love each other and that they do not necessarily need an active sex life to continue the marriage. However, sometimes they yearn to feel that spark of life that they felt in the early days of the relationship.

Factors that decrease sexual desire

If you are wondering what is going on between you and your partner, if you do not understand why the passion has subsided and how to get it back, pay attention to this list which, according to experts, would be the triggering factors of lack of desire in intimacy.

  • Boredom
  • Routine, and always do the same
  • Do not innovate or try new things
  • Always maintain the same habits year after year
  • Too many social and labor commitments
  • Personal carelessness and bad hygiene habits
  • Health problems
  • Lack of time
  • Grudges from the past

Break the routine to return to love with passion

Sometimes, without realizing it, we become bored and monotony takes over our lives. When we close the bedroom door, we want passion to take over our bodies . And, at least in women, it happens long before an intimate encounter.

To feel passion, we must build it and do something to keep it going . Passion does not arise magically if they have been arguing all day, disowning their children, or if they go to bed grumbling about problems.

However, if that day you chose to put on music, improvise a dance in the kitchen with your spouse and children, prepare the bathtub with salts for your partner, do a restorative massage on his shoulders, who arrived tired from work, or serve- give her a glass of wine while she cooks, you are building the foundations of this loving enthusiasm that will soon give free rein in due course.

Don’t underestimate your desires

Do not miss what love was “in times of youth”. Love and passionate delusion know no ages . We love with body and soul, and although in every moment of life we ​​love “differently”, as long as that spark remains lit, passion will continue to go deep into the relationship.

Human beings have a natural tendency to the new, to what gives us new sensations and to what makes us feel “alive”. When our partner does not pay attention to us, when our conversations are not interesting, it is customary for us to seek this “attention” from the outside, thus resulting  in infidelity .

However, if we give ourselves time, if we look more in the eye, if we look for time alone, out of the house, away for a moment from the routine of children and work, we will surely feel again what our body and our body yearns for. heart. What is still there, but needs to be agreed.

Experts assert that maintaining sexual contact periodically will increase desire, just as if sexual encounters are scarce, sexual desire will become less and less frequent. Therefore, the invitation is that we encourage ourselves to provide these meetings more often, so that passion does not die.


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