Now he wants to go back, do I give him a second chance?
You were having a beautiful romance with someone you love very much and suddenly things started to change. He was cold, distant and disinterested, and when you realized that, you did what you can to make things better and have the same harmonious and passionate relationship that you had before. However, the crisis only got worse as the days went by and the most feared moment came: the last conversation to end the relationship.
You cried, you despaired, you got depressed, and you went home for days just thinking of a way to win him back. The months passed and, with the distance, you finally managed to regain the strength to move on and find someone more suitable for a new relationship. However, after a few months of stable single life, you are surprised by something totally unexpected: the ex approaches and confesses that he made a mistake and should never have finished . And, amid confusion and despair, the big question arises: what now?
This type of situation is much more common than it looks and can happen to anyone who has an ex boyfriend, whether it’s a recent breakup or even after years of separation. When this moment arrives, the possibility of giving a second chance becomes something to be feared, because the trauma of separation and the risks of suffering everything again become remarkable.
On the other hand, there is still a feeling kept by him and the chances of having him back can mean finding once again the happiness that was achieved in the best time of the relationship. Between doubts and uncertainties, asking for time to think and organizing the mind to make the best possible decision becomes the first most viable solution. (Taking a break can be good for dating)
Pros and cons of the relationship
Any love relationship has its ups and downs, moments of maximum happiness and periods of strife and suffering. When deciding whether or not to give the ex a new chance, it is necessary to make an analysis of the time they spent together, the defects and qualities to be sure it will be worth it or not.
- What are his main strengths and weaknesses?
- When were you most happy to be with him?
- What was the real reason for the separation?
- What are the chances of him moving away again?
- Can you really say that you still feel something strong for him?
- Is there anyone at the moment that you are interested in?
To reflect on the pros and cons of the relationship , you need to answer these questions and better understand everything that has happened in the past few weeks that you have been together. The reasons that led to the end, his behavior during the crisis and, if they return, what can be done to make things different this time. In addition, it is also necessary to think about whether there is someone at the moment who may deserve your company more than he or not.
Does he deserve a second chance?
If it ended it was a decision that came from him and you ended up suffering a lot for it, now the right to reflect if he really deserves to recover what he lost is all yours. This means that you are in charge of the situation, so it is worth thinking about whether your ex is really the type of companion you want to have alongside. (10 signs that you’ve found the right guy)
This situation can be faced in several ways and, there are cases in which the ex is not a reliable person and even cases in which the courtship has already ended and returned several times. This type of situation can leave the woman stuck with a person who is not worth the effort. Now that you have recovered from the loss, it is in your hands to decide whether he deserves your admirable company again or not.
Start over slowly
If you thought about it a lot and decided that he deserves to be forgiven and that you want to go back to date with your ex, remember to do things calmly this time, because the period of reconquest is as important as the moment of conquest . Instead of throwing yourself into his arms again, tell him that you want to go slow and start to meet him again as if they are getting to know each other now.
In addition to valuing yourself, this attitude is the best way to rebuild a solid relationship with greater chances of succeeding this time. It is important that one gets used to the presence of the other in life again, that you talk about the news, take a couple outings and, finally, go back to dating when the relationship reaches the stable point of old.
If you run over things and go back to dating instantly, it is possible that there is an initial strangeness and that you are not comfortable in his presence. Especially if the time off is longer than six months, it is better to start over from scratch than to risk an instant restoration of the relationship that you once had.