When we talk about toxic relationships , we immediately refer to marriage and situations that occur at home, only.
It turns out that this problem is not restricted to the home, no. Toxic relationships are everywhere. Even in the work environment.
Therefore, knowing what types exist, it is easier to identify them and, above all, to know how to deal with them when they knock on our door.
Let’s see if you understand about this problem, which can even be common in our routine? Check with us everything you need to know about toxic relationships!
What are toxic relationships?
In general, it is an issue involving two or more people. In it, there is a marked disproportion between the pretensions, desires and perspectives regarding that relationship.
In other words: there are attitudes and behaviors that are toxic for maintaining a healthy relationship . This can happen in two ways.
The first one, when both sides have toxic behaviors. The second involves only one party, having someone passive to the other person’s attitudes.
What are the types of toxic relationships?
As we mentioned, toxic relationships tend to be easily associated with a loving relationship. Only it can occur in many ways. There are, for example, toxic friendships.
In them, criticism and offense are common. Falsehood reigns, and someone (or both) tries to take advantage of this alleged friendship. Often, people with low self-esteem, little self-knowledge and with tendencies to self- sabotage are the passive agents of this relationship.
As a result, they do not perceive or even react (when they notice the abusive behavior) when they discover that they are facing toxic relationships in their lives.
In addition, you may not realize it, but the work environment is full of toxic relationships. It happens all the time, and does not depend on hierarchical levels.
It can occur between teammates, between people from different areas, and also between boss and subordinate – or vice versa. In these cases, we can perceive common attitudes, such as:
- messages transmitted aggressively;
- attempt to diminish the person’s worth;
- minimization (or even recognition) of their achievements.
In turn, the affected person feels small and ill – physically and psychologically – close to the other person. The emotional sensation, in fact, is pure exhaustion. Such is the impact that person has on him through negative behaviors and attitudes.
How do you know if there are toxic relationships around?
Whether it is at home, in fraternal relationships or in everyday corporate life, it is possible to assess whether you are facing or close to toxic relationships, did you know?
For this, it is important to pay attention to some factors, such as:
- discussions, digressions and conflicts are constant;
- the victim position is constantly occupied by one of the people;
- coping tends to leave wounds (physical and emotional);
- there is no reciprocity in the relationship;
- empathy is unusual or even non-existent.
With these aspects constantly monitored, you can escape toxic relationships that you might not even be aware of what you were experiencing – or recognize in relationships from people close to you.
And in the work environment?
In addition to alerting colleagues, and learning to face toxic attitudes, you have an additional challenge in the workplace. And it is the contact with people that contaminate the place with their toxic attitudes.
For that, it is good to keep an eye on some fundamental points so that you do not let yourself be contaminated by this, let alone spread the same behavior – inadvertently.
Do not label
Avoid creating or sustaining labels for people. This type of problem can trigger situations that are harmful to them, such as bullying and other types of harassment that will hinder them both personally and in their performance within the company.
And, think: would you like them to do the same to you?
Don’t be part of the problem
Between the problem and the solution, which side are you on? Toxic relationships exist, but they dissipate if everyone is “vaccinated” against the nasty comments.
If you see someone mistreating another, take action. Make her realize that it is wrong and have more empathy, helping the victim to rise up and ignore such toxic relationships.
With that, your presence becomes part of the solution, not the problem.
Every day, you can learn something new, change your mind and also your perspectives. If until yesterday you didn’t know how to recognize toxic relationships, today the situation is different.
Therefore, use this knowledge to act within your limits to prevent aggressive behavior towards other people from being tolerated. Having a new perspective is essential to imposing a healthier and more balanced daily routine for you.
And, look, it has a profound positive impact on other people’s lives too.
Learn to distinguish toxic relationships
It is worth understanding, deeply, the difference between a toxic behavior and a complex temperament. For example: people who defend their ideas to the end are not necessarily toxic.
The “toxicity”, in this case, would come at the cost of offenses and attempts to diminish the people who suggested better ideas in the case in question. Confrontation and resistance are not wrong, only when your defender’s focus is on attacking other people, rather than the ideas themselves.
Work your emotional intelligence
Finally, this may be your big goal for 2020 : work on your emotional intelligence. Through it, you will recognize not only toxic relationships, but learn more about yourself.
With that, your actions and reactions, in different situations, will be taken with more awareness, assertiveness and according to your personality. And not because someone wants you to do it that way or the way they want it to.
It is worth noting that the subject is much more complex than that, but self-knowledge is an important starting point. Have you ever experienced or witnessed situations where toxic relationships showed up – with evidence or discretion?
Share your stories with us, in the comments field, so that more people can learn how to identify toxic relationships, and understand how to act in each situation!