How To Help A Shy Child Socialize.Dealing with Shy Children, Does your child often refuse to talk to new people or find it difficult to get along with his friends at school? It could be that your child has a shy nature. Some parents may worry that a child’s shyness may hinder his development both at school and in life in general.shyness is an innate characteristic of the child and must therefore be accepted.
Now, if you feel like that, it’s good for parents to realize in advance that ‘shame’ is not a negative thing. Shame is only part of the child’s personality and as parents must learn to accept the child’s condition.Children who grow up to be shy children may not be able to interact or get along with their friends. This of course can hinder the child’s future life. For example, it may be difficult for him to get along because of his shy nature, so his child often withdraws from socializing and he will feel lonely and feel that no one wants to be friends with him.
If a shy child doesn’t learn to get out of his ‘shell’, it will be difficult for the child to socialize in the work environment or whatever. Therefore, help your child to get out of his shyness and train him to socialize with his environment.
Here are some tips for dealing with shy children./How To Help A Shy Child Socialize
, first, changing your child’s shyness gradually is the key to dealing with shy children. Try to understand the child’s circumstances and give them time to get used to new people and new things.
Second, build children’s self-confidence by appreciating their work and also letting children feel that they are loved by their environment. Low self-esteem can also make children shy.
Third, teach them how to deal with their friends. Give simple suggestions on how to approach new people or make friends around them.
Fourth, do not press the child to get out of the ‘shell’ directly. If it is too forced, on the other hand, the child will withdraw and become less confident about socializing.
Fifth, avoid asking them to do things that make them uncomfortable. For example, forcing a shy child to sing or dance in front of a group of people. This will certainly make children uncomfortable, feel depressed and anxious.
Sixth, create interesting activities with friends at home. Parents can invite their school friends to play or study together at home. That way, children will feel more comfortable mingling with their friends at home.
Seventh, show empathy about the shame. Tell your child that feeling embarrassed sometimes also happens to adults and is not a mistake. So, it’s okay if someone has feelings of shame.
To encourage the shy child to be with others, it is necessary to gradually: give time, prepare in advance for social occasions, start from the simplest situations to help him gradually get used to it. You can start by inviting only one favorite friend into the house, an environment where the child is at ease. The ideal is that everything is decided together: who to invite, what to do, which games to propose, how to behave in case of quarrels.
At the beginning it may be useful for the parent to stay with the children to facilitate interaction and to offer the child a role model , but the goal is to increasingly decrease one’s presence to leave them alone, without intervening even in moments of tension or conflict. Only when the child feels comfortable with a friend, is it appropriate to gradually invite others and finally encourage him to join a group. Proposing the group right away is an excessive request because joining an already formed group requires more complex social skills in front of which a shy child can feel discouraged.
One way to encourage the approach to the group is to choose some extracurricular activity with the child in which there are other children . Many parents ask me what is the best activity in these cases. There is no absolute best activity, the important thing is to start from a child’s interest, his passion – whatever it is – and make sure that it can be practiced in a group.
Preparing with the child for social occasions is another way to help the shy child: what to say to a child in the park to propose that they play together? What to do when visiting other people’s homes? What words to use to ask classmates to join their game? It can be very useful to make real simulations, imagining the situation and practicing to manage it, after listening carefully to what makes the child uncomfortable, what worries him, without judging or minimizing, but trying to put himself in his shoes.
Telling a shy child not to be shy is the most counterproductive maneuver ever and unfortunately it is the most frequent one, often accompanied by a certain impatience and frustration. Forcing a shy child and pointing out the inadequacy of his behavior will only make his discomfort worse . Comparing with more outgoing siblings or peers will only make him feel more misunderstood and angry. Rather, it is useful to appreciate his efforts, the small steps, underlining the positive aspect but in a discreet way, without charging them with an excessive importance that would make the child feel under pressure, as if he could be fully accepted and loved only by changing his way to be.
