Looking for funny ways to tell someone to go away without being rude? Check out these clever and humorous phrases to politely show them the door.Let’s be honest, you went out to have a few drinks and meet people. Why didn’t you come? Being stalked by a person who drools at the sight of you. So, you’re probably wondering how to tell someone to leave you alone.
Now, we know you don’t mean to be rude, and you don’t actually have to be rude for someone to understand that you want to be left alone. But at the same time, sometimes you need to be stern. The thing is, no matter how you do it, it’s awkward.
Funny Ways to Tell Someone to Go Away.
Here are some great ways to tell someone to leave you alone without making them feel… well… annoying and clingy. Because eventually, you have to tell them in whatever way they’re willing to hear it.
1. Walk away
Just leave. You don’t need to waste time standing there awkwardly. Say you need to leave. Then leave. Now, if you’re at a party, you’ll probably run into them again, but just smile and walk on by or leave the party.
There will be others. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, remember that.
2. Tell them directly
If you are non-confrontational, this may be a little awkward and uncomfortable for you, but it is the most efficient way to get rid of someone you don’t want to be with.
Just tell them that you’re not interested in them or that you want some space for yourself. You probably cringed reading that, but you have to do it. Look, you can say it politely, you just need to be firm.
3. Cut off communication
If you have texted them or even responded to their texts or calls, stop. Stop all communication with them. If you continue, you have no one to blame but yourself.
So, stop all contact with them. Let them know why you stopped talking to them, but the point is to stop. [Read: How to get someone to stop texting you – A step by step guide]
4. Block them from social media
This is more for them than for you. Blocking them from social media allows them to literally spend some time away from you. Out of sight, out of mind, right? That’s the goal here.So if you have them on Facebook or Instagram, delete them. They don’t need any encouragement.
5. Don’t leave doors open
Don’t leave them any chance. Don’t flirt with them, don’t say you’ll see them later or that you want to be friends.You need to cut off the relationship you have with them, regardless of how long you’ve known them. Just cut it off. If not, they’ll try to find a way to crawl back to you.
6. Don’t gossip about them
It’s best not to talk badly about them to other people, especially if you’re mutual friends. If you want to tell someone to leave you alone, leave them alone even if it’s indirectly. The worst thing you can do is gossip about them and let them find out. You want them to stay away from you, not resent you.
7. Get support from friends and family
You need to let people know that there is someone who won’t leave you alone. If you’re at a party and someone is clinging to you, tell your friends. They’ll be able to help you. If it gets worse, tell your family. I know it’s a little awkward to tell your parents that someone won’t leave you alone, but you need the support. They’re there for you.
8. Don’t stay where they are
I know you always go to that coffee shop on the corner of your street, but it’s time to pick a new spot if that’s your regular spot, too. Now, you can come back after a couple of weeks or months, but it’s best, for now, to give this person a break from seeing you so they have time to move on. You want them to move on, right?
9. Use the boyfriend card
I hate using this card because I like to think I handle things on my own. Plus, it’s pretty sexist for guys to not respect what you want, but respect that you’re another guy’s property. But that’s a conversation or another time.
Every now and then, to tell someone to leave you alone, you might need to pull out the boyfriend card. Most people will leave you alone after this. If they know you’re not available, they’re more likely to move on.
10. Be empathetic
The best way to tell someone to leave you alone is to understand why they won’t. Be empathetic to them and take time to understand what their crush on you is. Then you let them down easily.It’s easy to tell someone to “fuck off,” but you’re not sure what the reaction will be. If you let them down nice and easy, it will be easier on you in the long run.
11. Contact the police
So, you’ve tried every tool you have. You’ve been empathetic, you’ve politely told them to leave you alone, but nothing works. Your safety is the most important thing, so if this person isn’t listening to your demands, to hell with them.It’s time to get the police involved. You don’t feel safe and you obviously can’t get rid of this person on your own. Call the police.
12. Don’t become violent
While you may need to send an effective message, violence is never the answer. The last thing you need is to be arrested for assaulting the scumbag who won’t leave you alone.
How to tell someone to leave you alone over text
Life being what it is today, most bullying takes place online. Whether it’s cyberbullying or someone who won’t stop texting you, learning how to tell someone to leave you alone with text messages can sometimes be difficult.
In person, you can be stern and avoid them. By text, you can continue to communicate until you need to change your number.
13. Tell them to stop
This sounds easier than it is, but try to think about it. Telling someone to leave you alone over text means you don’t have to deal with the tears or sad looks. Just say that you’re not interested in engaging in any communication.
14. Ghosts
Honestly, ghosting is painful and one of the cruelest things you can do. It’s so disrespectful. But if you’ve already told them you want to stop talking and they won’t respect your wishes or privacy, by all means shut it down.
15. Be robotic
This is something that will almost always work and you don’t even have to block them. Send them a text message with these words: SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT.
16. Block them
You just have to do it. Go to your settings and block their number. This way, they can get to whatever they want, but you don’t have to deal with them.
17. Inform them
Report them to your phone company, the police, and make sure the trusted people in your life know what’s going on. You may not get much help from the authorities if it’s just annoying text messages, but making a report has something on the record in case things get worse.
So, now you have the tools to tell someone to leave you alone. Next time someone is on top of you and you’re about to choke, tell them one of these lines. If that doesn’t work, you’re going to have to show some teeth.