Not having a mate at a mature age can be a burden in itself. There are many worries that arise from the whispers of neighbors to the fear of living alone to old age.
However, no matter how strong the reason for being afraid, you should be able to manage your own thoughts well. Because fear will interfere with your life.
For example, you can’t focus on getting work done. And wrongly, you open yourself up to any potential partner.
Of course this is not good because it could be that the candidate likes to lie and has a bad temper. So, in order not to think too much about your mate, here are 9 ways that you should try.
1. Stop Listening Too Much to What People Say
In many cases, people feel pressured not to get married quickly because they listen too much to their neighbors or relatives.
Indeed, our society in general has certain expectations regarding the age that is considered appropriate for marriage.
When you have reached that age but don’t get a soul mate, you will often receive advice and satire.
However, is it worth listening to these people?
Your life is your own. You are sad and happy, you feel it yourself.
If you think too much of those expectations, the one who is dizzy is you. Especially if you are in a hurry to get married and even get a bad partner.
Therefore, learn not to confuse what people say. Even if someone advises you to get married, just respond casually or jokingly.
Also read : 8 ways to deal with satire from friends without being provoked by emotions
2. Believe that Everyone’s Path is Different
Some of you may be dizzy thinking about your soul mate because you always compare yourself to others. You feel jealous of colleagues who have found a beautiful mate.
And you also feel inferior when your cousins have cute and adorable children. But did you know that everyone’s path is different?
At this time maybe you really haven’t found a partner. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t be happy.
And maybe God has a plan for when you will get married. So, why bother?
3. Focus on Career
One effective way to not think too much about your partner is to focus on your career. Especially if the career is in accordance with your passion.
By focusing on your career, you will also have many opportunities and benefits.
First, of course the coffers of your savings will increase. In this way, you can be filial to your parents and please your younger siblings.
Second, you will master more skills that may be very useful in the future.
And third, you will get a coworker who can accompany your days without a partner.
Also read : 10 Soft Skills Needed in the World of Work
4. Stay Open but Don’t Rush
The most ideal attitude in relation to a mate is to remain open but not in a hurry.
This way of thinking will help you not to be depressed but also not necessarily deny yourself that you need a partner.
You should ideally still be actively trying to find a partner. For example:
- get to know friends
- using dating app
- or perform taaruf.
However, once again, don’t push yourself too hard if you haven’t found a good lover yet. Believe that everyone has their own path.
5. Hangout with friends so you won’t be lonely
Loneliness often comes to those who still haven’t found their soul mate. Especially if the person concerned lives in an overseas land without relatives.
If you are in this condition, you should not stay silent and let the loneliness torture you.
Because, if you let this feeling for too long, you can stress thinking about why you don’t have a partner.
As one way out, you can invite friends to accompany your days. Do fun things so you don’t think too much about your mate who hasn’t come yet.
For example, watching movies on the weekends to playing together to famous tourist spots.
Also read : 11 Ways to Enjoy Life More Meaningfully
6. Join the Community
Having a friend you can take everywhere is fun. But what if you don’t have a single friend?
It’s also a good idea to try following the community. There are many communities that can be followed in various cities in Indonesia. For example, the community of cyclists, motorbikes, mountain climbers, cat lovers, and the like.
By following these communities, you can spend your holidays with interesting activities.
So, you don’t need to feel melancholy all day because you haven’t found a life partner yet. In fact, you might even get a partner in the community.
Also read : 10 Ways To Be An Sociable Person To Have Many Friends
7. Pursue Your Hobby
In addition to participating in community activities, another thing to avoid worrying too much about matchmaking is to pursue a hobby. For example, you have always liked to draw.
However, you can never hone this talent because your parents think drawing is a wasted ability.
Now that you are an adult and can live independently, just pursue that talent again. You can take courses or learn via YouTube.
So, take a few hours each day off to pursue this hobby. You can also be distracted from constantly thinking about marriage.
8. Active in Social Activities
Helping the less fortunate is a noble thing. And this activity can also help you not to think too much about your partner.
In fact, that’s not all you can get. In general, too, your view of life will be broader.
In the end you may realize that your singleness is nothing compared to the sadness of those unlucky people.
You will also develop into a wiser and mature person. Nice, isn’t it?
9. Apply a Healthy Lifestyle
So that you avoid deep sadness because you don’t have a partner, apply a healthy lifestyle . Because a healthy body will help you suppress negative thoughts.
You have to make sure you get enough sleep, do exercise, and eat nutritious foods.
If possible, also follow gymnastics and other sports. So you can be more excited to implement a healthy lifestyle.
Closing
It is natural to crave the figure of a life partner. But it becomes unnatural when you are too obsessed with meeting your soul mate right away.
Your mind will become depressed, and your head will be filled with vague fears. That’s why you should try not to think too much about your mate.
Try the 9 ways above from now on. Good luck!