It can be difficult to objectively evaluate someone you’re emotionally attached to, but sometimes it’s important to take off your rose-colored glasses. See a match on several points? You’re too good for them!
Regular loans
Force majeure happens to everyone – if your significant other forgot his credit card somewhere, and his phone died at the most inopportune moment, it’s okay to lend him money for a taxi. But you shouldn’t feel like an employee of a microloan office. It’s not a fact that you’re communicating with a gigolo, but almost certainly this person is endlessly flying to the bottom of a financial hole and will one day drag you down with him if he gets married.
Suspicious secrecy
So, you’ve talked and found out that everything is serious and you are now officially a couple. Only he asks you not to go with him to a family holiday – he says it will be boring, he doesn’t introduce you to his friends – it’s “a purely male company”, there is no talk of tagging you on social networks. Yes, all this seems like paranoia, but if you already feel uneasy in this relationship, then what will happen next? By the way, we advise you to make sure that you are listed in his phone under your name. What if you are not the only “muse” of your lover?
He was dating your friend.
Instead of asking for your friend’s blessing, take a sober look at the situation. Think about how you yourself will feel. Firstly, you will hardly be able to discuss the relationship with her, secondly, if it comes to comparisons, it will be doubly painful. And notice, such a delicate situation does not embarrass him. Who knows, maybe you will not become the last “victim” of a bad lover in your company.
Still lives with his mother
He’s in his early 30s and still lives with his parents? If the guy has almost saved up for his own apartment, that’s even commendable. But if the reason is that he’s more comfortable this way: his mom cooks, washes his clothes, and pays the rent, you don’t even have to convince him to move out. After all, all these “honorable” responsibilities can become yours. Are you ready to adopt your own man?
You are ashamed
Being ashamed of your boyfriend means only one thing: you understand that he is not up to your level, but you are afraid to admit it to yourself. This is a good reason to end the relationship. The main thing is to admit your mistake and move on without looking back.
Obsession
Having hobbies and interests is a feature of any developed personality. But no matter what your chosen one likes, football, fishing or even tango evenings, make sure that he is ready to combine an active life with a relationship. Gambling addiction, for example, is no better than alcoholism. Your man should not live in a virtual world, only nominally being next to you.
Lack of work
Most people start a career soon after reaching adulthood. Even teenagers try to find a part-time job so as not to ask their parents for money. If a guy thinks it’s normal to spend months looking for a dream job and each time finds a reason to refuse a vacancy, this is simply not serious. A person who cannot take responsibility for himself is unlikely to be able to take responsibility for a family.