Are you guilty of being selfish? Are you desperate to change this to stop hurting your loved one?
While we don’t like being around egotistical individuals, others may also find you maddening. Your partner may really love you, but if you continue to treat them insensitively, they might get tired.
If you don’t want to lose your partner because of your self-centeredness, read these 20 Ways to Stop Being Self-centered in Your Relationship:
1. Internalize this truth.
Acceptance of the truth is the first step in change. You have to admit your flaws and stop being in denial. This way you will be open to self-improvement.
2. Think about your partner’s feelings.
It is important to take your partner’s feelings into account. Before you say or do anything, ask yourself how it might affect your partner. Would it hurt or offend him? If so, why pursue it?
3. Give him the chance to express himself.
You are not the only one with the right to freedom of expression. Just as you ask your partner to hear your whims, listen to them too. Don’t tell your partner to shut up when they want to talk about how they are feeling.
4. Stop thinking that you are always right.
One of the worst types of self-deception is thinking that you are always right. Your partner may think differently than you, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re wrong. You cannot impose your opinions, principles and beliefs on him. Respect everything as you want to be respected.
5. Be open-minded.
Related to pas. 4, you need to practice open-mindedness. It means acknowledging that you are probably wrong and that others may be right. For this reason, you need to listen to the thoughts and opinions of your partner. Learn to weigh subjective and objective reasoning.
6. Practice putting your partner first.
If you are used to going first, try this one this time. Before you ask yourself what you want to eat for lunch, ask your partner first. Instead of asking for help with work or school, ask if he needs help.
7. Stop talking about “me” and “I”.
One of the signs of self-centeredness is talking about yourself all the time. If you notice that your favorite words are “I” and “me” then you need to think about it. Begin the change by asking your partner about their day or ideas while fighting the temptation to talk about yours.
8. Be humble.
A selfless person is humble – so you must be one. Be prepared to admit your mistakes and don’t think that you are better than others. Learn to apologize when you know you’re the culprit.
9. Be generous.
Avoid being stingy with time, affection, and even resources. Whenever you can afford it, give gifts to your partner, whether small or simple. Don’t think of dates as a waste of time, but instead plan a quality affair together. Let your partner feel like he’s worth everything. Of course, don’t exceed your means.
10. Seek the advice of your partner for decision making.
Since you are committed to your partner, he deserves to know about your plans. Before making big decisions, ask him what he thinks about it. This way, your partner will feel that you are not neglecting their value in your life.
11. Stop being too possessive.
Please stop behaving like your partner could be easily ripped off from you. If you are sure of his love for you, why not trust him? Don’t forbid her to talk to the opposite sex or to meet her friends.
12. Give your partner space to grow.
Also, be selfless enough to allow your partner to explore life. Encourage him to follow his dreams and try new opportunities. Don’t tie your partner to your fear of finding someone else.
13. Avoid being demanding.
Your partner’s world does not revolve around you. Be more understanding whenever he / she can’t give you enough time. If you know the person has a lot to do, don’t add to the burden by requiring more time and attention.
14. Be prepared to sacrifice yourself at times.
If you really love your partner, then sacrificing for him / her will be natural when needed. You wouldn’t mind going the extra mile for someone you really love. You do this even at the expense of your own comfort or needs.
15. Learn to compromise.
A self-centered person wants everything to go their own way. If you are guilty of it, it’s time to open up to adjustments to make your relationship harmonious. The only solution to lifestyle and preference issues in a relationship is to meet halfway.
16. Stop feeling empowered.
No matter how successful, popular, or wealthy you are, don’t view your partner as an inferior person. Don’t expect him to follow your every whim and serve you all the time. You both have equal rights and you should be humble to each other.
17. Remember the golden rule.
To keep things simple, apply the Golden Rule in your relationship. Don’t do to your partner what you don’t want to be done to you. Treat him the way you want to be treated.
18. Reach out.
Stop expecting your partner to always take the first step. Be prepared to initiate reconciliation during LQs. Also, whenever your relationship starts to get cold and stagnant, be the first to try and bring back the sweetness.
19. Be more aware of your actions.
If you are aware of your selfish tendencies, you should be aware of your behaviors until you have overcome them. Think before you say or do something. You can also do a regular self-assessment to see if you are improving.
20. Be more focused on God.
Strengthening your devotion to God will help you shift your focus away from yourself. Decide to serve him and live a life that pleases him. As a result, humility is one of the traits that will be developed in your character. Of course, change doesn’t happen overnight, but if you don’t give up, you will be transformed.
Less of yourself
Self-esteem is good, but too much is not. Think about the people around you as well. True love will put others before you.