20 reminders for anyone who has fallen in love with someone’s idea instead of reality.

Seeing the potential where no one else does it is a testament to your character. Good people see good in people.

2. It is like this quote from Yeoshin Lourdes: “To see goodness in a man who has not already demonstrated goodness? It is a projection of your own humanity and divinity. Stop projecting. “

3. Despite all those beauties about what great person you are to be able to see the current circumstances of past people, the truth is that falling in love with someone’s potential is an unhealthy coping mechanism, and for the sake of your future and health. mental, you have to let it go.

4. Believing in what a relationship might be contrary to what it is, can quickly become a dangerous and toxic slope. It can be your downfall. You must be able to discern reality from what you would like reality to be.

5. If anyone wants to be with you, they will stay with you.

6. If someone does not want to be with you, he will do one of two things: he will ignore you or keep you in his life but he will make up an apology.

7. People reveal who they really are at all times, with suggestions and comments and gestures of passage to strangers. It is your choice to ignore those red stakes.

8. You’re right: nobody is perfect. But everyone must be responsible.

9. It is naive to assume that everyone will improve over time. People are committed to their inner growth, personal development and the well-being of their life as a whole. But people who don’t, they probably won’t.

10. Most of the time, you will look back and in people where you have seen so much potential you will realize that their refusal was a dodged bullet. At the time you didn’t realize it.

11. You are not letting go of this person. You are letting go of the expectations you had about the role they would play in your life.

You’re not hoping, you’re stuck. And often, holding onto some hope for a person or relationship is what we do when we are too afraid to move forward. This makes sense, because right now, you can only measure what you will lose. You still cannot see what you will get.

13. If I stopped making all the efforts in the relationship, what would become of it? If the answer is nothing, it means that you are not in a relationship, you are in a mirror room where you are projecting everything you want into a partner onto a spectator.

14. No wonder they are disappointing you.

15. You are not undecided about this relationship. You are not sure. After all, you know the truth about it and you are too afraid to admit that you know the truth, so you are distracting yourself.

16. It is not your responsibility to always see good in people. It is your responsibility to see them honestly. Goodness is proven and respect is earned.

You are attached to this person to give yourself a sense of direction or self. Once you stop giving them all your energy, you will be able to heal those fundamental wounds that hold you back.

18. The person who will ultimately benefit from all this is you … if you have the courage to wake up and leave. You deserve someone who sees in you what you see in them. You deserve someone to show up, stay and commit immediately. And you deserve it because, in your heart, you just want to love and be loved, that’s why you’re holding on so tightly.

19. You cannot base a relationship around potential. You can not. The rule of thumb is this: if you knew that the person you are with would be exactly the same for the rest of their lives, would you want to be with them forever?

20. If the answer is not yes, then why are you doing it now?

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