Confidentiality is crucial for most people, if not all. We value personal space and take offense when others, unless authorized, interfere in our private affairs. Interfacing in other people’s lives, in most cases, is a sign of disrespect, and if you’re one of those people who do it constantly, consider following these ways to help break the habit.
1. Keep yourself busy.
Sometimes people interfere with other people’s lives just because they have nothing to do with theirs. They are bored or looking for something to fill their time. If you find yourself in this camp, try to deal. If you are unemployed, find a job. If you are bored, play a game or exercise. If you are just looking for entertainment, watch a movie or a reality show. Any activity is okay as long as it keeps your mind from interfering with the lives of others.
2. Focus on self-improvement.
Perhaps better than just keeping busy is focusing on improving yourself. Instead of telling others how to improve their lives, just focus on improving yours. Your intentions might be in the right place, but if people are already showing their distaste for your constant intervention, then just let yourself follow your own advice. Instead of constantly telling Gwen how she should spend her money, invest yours in a profitable business, or instead nagging Ben to stop wasting his time playing video games, just focus on using the yours to learn a skill or meet new people.
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3. Ask permission before intervening.
There are times when it’s okay to interfere with another person’s life, especially if the intention is to help that person or prevent them from doing something ridiculous. However, whatever your intention, you should always ask permission before intervening. Before giving your opinion or advice, be courteous enough to ask the other person if it’s okay for you if you are expressing your thoughts. It would communicate a clear message to the other person that you respect their privacy and just want to offer wisdom or a friendly reminder because you care about them.
4. Don’t push it.
Now, don’t make the permission you got as an excuse to continue meddling despite the other person’s firm refusal to take your advice or heed your opinion. You need to know when to stop insisting. If Mike really doesn’t want to leave his cheating girlfriend, there comes a time when you need to stop meddling with her decision. You have already done your part, and whether or not Mike will change his mind is now entirely up to him. Again say what you have to, but don’t push it.
5. Keep gossip away.
Gossip is a major driving force in why people interfere in the lives of others. They are intrigued by the affairs of others and the knowledge they acquire, whether true or false, inspires them to get involved and encroach on their personal space. However, you wouldn’t want people talking behind your back and violating your privacy, so try to stay away from gossip. Doing this will not only help you stop unsolicited intrusion, but it will also help you become a more ethical and moral person.
6. Stick to the limits.
There is a wall between each person, and you shouldn’t just blast others or force your way. This wall must always be respected. It is only when the other person opens the door that you can enter. After all, you yourself have such a wall protecting your kingdom from secrets, beliefs and interests, and you surely don’t want anyone to arbitrarily breach your wall and just waltz your domain.
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7. Be sensitive.
There are times when people do something wrong because they don’t realize what they are doing is wrong. The same can be true when people invade other people’s lives. The first might ignore the fact that he / she already offends the second; this is why we must be sensitive enough to know if we are already acting out of step. We need to constantly reflect and empathize so that we develop a level of sensitivity that will tell us when we are already domineering and therefore should take a step back.
8. Place a daily reminder.
If it has already become your habit to interfere in other people’s lives, then perhaps a more conventional method should be employed. Try pasting a note on your fridge or use wallpaper on your phone that says “Stick to the limits”, “You won’t pass” or any other statement or symbol that will constantly remind you not to interfere with the lives of others. Doing this might sound silly, but extreme habits require extreme measures.
9. Keep your thoughts to yourself.
The solution you are looking for could be as low-key as the silence itself. Often it is when we open our mouths that the interference begins. We speak when we just need to look, or we criticize when we just need to look. Of course, there are times when we should voice our concerns, but there are also times when it’s best to keep our thoughts to ourselves. Sometimes nothing is enough.
10. Always think before you act.
Besides the use of our words, we also interfere with the affairs of others through our actions. And so, we must always think before we act. For example, before you throw away John’s toy collection in the hopes that it will help him grow, think about how such an act is going to upset John and violate his choices first. Thinking before acting will prevent us from making unnecessary and unsolicited interventions and will help us avoid the consequences of reckless and impulsive decision-making.
We must always respect the privacy and choices of others. Their life is theirs and we should not force them to live their life the way we want to. You can express your concern and give your opinion, but you should still have respect and know the limits.
