To move on and not waste years of your life, sometimes you need to admit that love was there, but it’s gone. The following 10 signs will indicate a relationship in which there is no room for feelings.
He doesn’t seem special to you anymore.
In the “rose-colored glasses” of love, a partner seems to be one of a kind. But even when the romantic flair of the beginning of a relationship dissipates, the conviction remains that you are with that one, special, your person. But when it begins to seem that a person’s shortcomings outweigh their advantages and you come to the conclusion that there are no irreplaceable people – this can be anything but love.
You complain about him to those around you
There is no such thing as a perfect relationship, and all couples benefit from letting off steam from time to time. It is normal to complain about your partner privately to a close friend. But at the same time, the habit of regularly and publicly speaking disparagingly about your life partner may indicate that there is no trace left of your former feelings. People are usually proud of their loved ones and boast about their achievements, rather than throwing mud at them at the first opportunity.
You stopped worrying about him.
Love is accompanied by anxiety in one way or another. You don’t have to be jealous to worry about your partner’s late return or that he or she doesn’t pick up the phone for a long time. The value of a person in your eyes makes you worry not only about his or her fidelity, but also about his or her safety and health. At the same time, if you have emotionally let go of a person, a formal separation will soon occur.
You have stopped arguing altogether.
A complete absence of even minor conflicts may seem like a good sign, but it’s too early to rejoice. No two people are alike, which means that from time to time you will have to defend your point of view and your vision of a particular situation. When you no longer feel the need to discuss anything, this is a clear sign of indifference. In fact, you are simply tired and have given up: you don’t care whether to be together or not.
You don’t try to spend more time together.
He’s going away on a business trip for a month? Great. Taking a vacation? Alas, you have other plans – for example, working late. Don’t be fooled by the illusion that the inability to spend an evening or weekend together is the result of external, irresistible forces. If you notice that you thrive on solitude and don’t miss your other half at all, it seems that there are no feelings between you anymore.
Physical intimacy is a thing of the past
Falling in love with someone by default implies attraction, including physical attraction. If you stop wanting sex, it may be a sign that the relationship is on the decline. A physically healthy couple in love will want sex – that’s nature. However, if you’ve fallen out of love, you may feel more like friends than romantic partners, and therefore be comfortable without intimacy even in the context of confidential communication.
You don’t plan dates
A date is not necessarily a romantic candlelit dinner. A walk in the park, breakfast at a coffee shop near your home, going to the cinema – this is any way to spend time with your loved one in a comfortable environment for communication by mutual consent. When he is not there – there are probably no feelings. You just go with the flow and at best talk about everyday issues.
You are embarrassed by your partner
Lovers want to shout to the whole world about what a wonderful person is next to them. If you realize that you feel embarrassed because of being with your partner in public or are burning with shame because of his actions – mentally you have already renounced the union that did not live up to your expectations. It seems that you are not on the same path: it’s time to admit it and let each other go.
You have reasons to be together, but feelings are not one of them.
Often people continue to live together even when there is no trace of love left. When the heart switches off, logic switches on – you start to come up with excuses that seem convincing to you. For example, to continue to tolerate each other for the sake of the children, because you are afraid to move on, or because of the economic side of the issue, such as shared living space. Starting all over again alone is not easy, but living with someone you don’t love is also a waste of life, nothing else.
You constantly compare him to others
Another sure sign that you have fallen out of love with each other is constant comparisons of your partner with other men. Perhaps you even casually “shop around” alternative options, as if it were not a partner but a new sofa, and catch yourself thinking about what your life would be like with this or that candidate. All this indicates a lack of feelings – deep down, you have already come to terms with the upcoming separation and have come to the conclusion that any relationship will be better than the one you are in now.